Deadly Fruit and Other Random Drabbles
by Naisa
Summary: A series of humorous drabbles less than 500 words, where YOU chose the word each drabble was based on! Random stories ranging from pineapples to parrots, from catpults to kerfuffles and from troglodytes to ice cream. Hope you enjoy!
1. Deadly Fruit

_Boredom + urge to write = great mood for a random drabble! :D_

_This is actually the first drabble I've written, so I hope you like it! If it gets lots of responses I might carry on with some more! :)_

_Thanks to Gina Frodo H for giving me an idea (or rather, one random word that I had to work on, you'll probably work out what it is when you read!)_

_Anyway, hope you enjoy! Reviews are awesome! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Deadly Fruit<span>

"Stay back Merlin!" Arthur yelled, clutching his sword tightly.

"What? What is it?" Merlin demanded, eyes wide with worry. He was panting heavily from running all away from his chambers to the Great Hall, the warning bell ringing in his ears.

"A deadly beast has come to storm upon Camelot!"

Merlin looked around the terrified-looking Arthur, and raised an eyebrow.

"Err…is that it?" He asked.

"Yes, stay back!"

"But Arthur…" Merlin stepped forward, "it's a pineapple."

Arthur paused, lowering his sword, "what?"

"A pineapple, a type of fruit. People eat it."

"But how did it get here?"

Merlin shrugged, "don't ask me, we also have potatoes, and we shouldn't have those for another hundred years, we don't know where those came from."

There was a pause. "So it's safe?"

"Yes, why are you so disappointed?" Merlin asked.

Arthur shrugged, "I was bored, I hoped I might be able to fight something." He admitted, but then he gave a smile. "Although, there is an alternative…"

"I. Hate. You. Arthur. Pendragon." Merlin fumed, ducking as much as it was physically possible in the stocks, as more pieces of pineapple came flying in his direction.

He really shouldn't have said it was a fruit.


	2. Monkey Business

_So, I've decided to carry on with these drabbles, as I've had an idea (please, don't run away screaming, hear me out!)_

_The idea came to me after my friend Gina gave me one random word to work on for a drabble (Deadly Fruit), and I thought that I could write a series of drabbles based on random words that people give me!_

_So, if you have a random word, a favourite word, whatever (preferably not rude) send it to me in a review, and I'll try to write a drabble from it! I'm up for a challenge, and quite looking forward to writing some random drabbles, so send me the most random words you can so we can all have a laugh!_

_I've chosen the word for this second drabble – monkey. I hope you like it! It would be great it you told me what you think! (You can give me a word, opinion, or both! There is really no excuse for not reviewing now! Muhahahaa ;) )_

_Anyway, enjoy!_

Monkey Business

Arthur, was in a bad mood. He was in a bad mood because he was feeling jealous. He was feeling jealous of Gwen, and a monkey.

Yes, a monkey.

It all started off when a man from far off lands arrived at Camelot, selling all sorts of luxurious goods, including spices, silk, and even animals. When the man left, he left a monkey (Arthur believes on purpose). The monkey then found its way to the castle, and somehow managed to find Gwen. Gwen immediately fell in love with the adorable, fury creature that had suddenly appeared on the windowsill one day. She loved the way it climbed on her shoulders and played with her hair. She decided to show her new friend to Arthur.

Arthur was not impressed.

He did not like this monkey, especially when it bit him on the nose and pooped in his shoes (Merlin found this hilarious until he was told that he would have to clean up the shoes.) Arthur therefore told Gwen to get rid of the monkey (which had been named Arty, to further Arthur's annoyance.)

Gwen refused.

This was how Arthur found himself alone in his chamber, coming to the slow realisation that the love of his life may have just replaced him with a monkey.

Oh well, it could be worse, it could have been a Knight…


	3. Distraction

_The random word for this drabble is 'bubbles' and was chosen by AlwaysWatching96, so thank you!_

_I'm not sure how many of these drabbles I'm actually going to do, what do you think? I might just say I'll do ten for now, and if they're popular I'll carry on with some more! :)_

_Anyway, hope you all enjoy! Reviews and random words much appreciated! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Distraction<span>

Arthur strode into the court physician's chambers, looking for the same person he was always looking for when he strode into the court physician's chambers – Merlin.

It didn't take Arthur long to find him today, Merlin was sitting at Gaius' work bench, phials and beakers surrounding him, Gaius was sitting in a chair nearby, reading a book.

"Merlin, where have you been?" Arthur began, skipping all polite greetings as usual. "You're meant to be polishing my armour, and you still haven't cleaned the stables, why are you just sitting there?" He demanded.

Merlin didn't respond, he just stared up at the ceiling.

"Merlin!" Arthur snapped.

"There's no point Arthur," said Gaius, lowering his book to glance at Merlin, "he's busy looking at the bubbles."

It was then Arthur realised that all around Merlin, were a collection of floating bubbles, drifting across the chamber. The interesting thing about these bubbles, was that they were all different colours and were all drifting calmly through the air.

"How did they get there?" Arthur asked.

"It was my fault," Gaius explained as he went back to his book. "I was doing an experiment and I dropped a phial, the bubbles burst out of it and have been floating around ever since."

Arthur considered this as he drew up a chair, watching the bubbles. "Well," he said, "they are very pretty…"

Arthur never finished his sentence, and then next time Gaius looked up from his book, there were two men staring, open mouthed and glazy eyed at the floating bubbles.


	4. The Art of Lying

_Today's random word is 'flashiness' by bubblepunk12, cheers! :D_

_I must admit I struggled a little with this one, but I hope you all like what I've come up with!_

_Please keep the reviews and random words coming! :D_

* * *

><p><span>The Art of Lying<span>

Most people know that Merlin is rubbish at lying, and today is no exception.

"Merlin," said Arthur, as he watched his manservant move around his chamber, trying to tidy it up. "You didn't see anything strange last night did you?"

Merlin paused, and swallowed, "no," he responded in a worryingly slow voice.

"Because I was trying to get some sleep last night, after the banquet, when there was a strange flashing light outside my window."

_Banquet, so that's how I got hold of so much mead! _Merlin thought to himself, trying to ignore a headache the size of Arthur's ego. "Really?" He replied, "what did it look like?"

Arthur threw his hands up in annoyance. "What does flashing light look like! It was just a bright, flashiness thing, outside my window!" He watched as Merlin's face grew slowly more guilty. "You wouldn't have anything to do with it, would you?"

"Me?" _No, no, because I didn't get drunk and start throwing stars at your window because you made me dress up in a stupid Camelot outfit again. _"Of course not Sire!" Merlin told Arthur in an unusually high pitched voice.

Arthur raised a disbelieving eyebrow, but didn't question his manservant any more as Merlin scurried out of sight. Not surprisingly, he wasn't bothered by any more flashing lights after that guilt-filled conversation.


	5. Arthur is a Prat

_The random word for this drabble is 'parrot', chosen by BagginsPotterPevensie, so many thanks! I hope you all enjoy! :D_

_Random words and reviews make Merlin smile, you want to see him smile…don't you? :P_

* * *

><p><span>Arthur is a Prat<span>

Would you like some advice Merlin?" Said a furious Arthur as he stormed up to Merlin one Camelot afternoon.

"Not really, but I think I'm about to get some," Merlin admitted.

"Never talk to multicoloured birds!"

Merlin paused, "what?"

"They repeat what you say!" Arthur almost roared. He began pacing, never a good sign. "I was in a meeting, a _very _important one, with my father and _all_ the Knights, when a multicoloured bird appeared, sat on the window frame, and started singing 'Arthur is a prat'!"

It was suddenly very difficult for Merlin not to laugh. "It's called a parrot Arthur—"

"I don't care if it's called a chimney pot! It wouldn't fly away! It just sat there saying 'Arthur is a prat' over and over again!"

"It may have a point—"

But then Arthur gave a mean smile. "Well your friend the parrot left a nice mess on the castle wall, and you're cleaning it up!" And with that, he marched off.

"Clotpole," Merlin grumbled, not realising that a certain multicoloured bird had just flew to the window, and had just learned a new word to sing as it flew around the castle.


	6. Symptoms of Peculiarity

_The word for this drabble is 'whimsical' (meaning acting in a strange yet amusing way) chosen by my friend Bella, aka Fairy-Tale-Rocker, so thank you!_

_This was another tricky one, I wasn't sure what to do, but I hope what I've come up with is OK!_

_For any of you who are interested, my book that I'm working on, Poppy Girl, (see profile page) now has a facebook page! See my profile (again) for more details if you're interested in joining! :D_

_Anyway, enjoy! Don't forget to review and give some random words! :)_

* * *

><p><span>Symptoms of Peculiarity<span>

Merlin approached Gaius with caution, still trying to work out what he should say. The court physician was at his desk, writing a letter, but looked up when an uneasy Merlin cleared his throat.

"Gaius, we have a bit of a problem," Merlin began.

A suspicious eyebrow was immediately raised. "What is it?" Gaius asked.

"Well, it's Arthur, he's acting a little…odd, peculiar, whimsical!" Merlin said, trying to find the right words.

"In what way?"

"Well…he's got a bit of a sore throat, he just sits in his chamber and croaks, and he's gone a little…green. But what is strangest of all, is his change in diet, he suddenly has a strong interest in flies." Merlin explained.

There was a long pause.

"You've turned him into a frog haven't you?" Said Gaius.

"Little bit."

Gaius sighed and hurried off to the Prince's chamber, before an unfortunate servant or King stumbled across him.


	7. Anger Management

_The word for this drabble is crapulous (meaning over-eating) and was chosen by 'jedichild', so thank you!_

_This is one of my longer ones, but it's not the funniest, I hope you like it anyhow!_

_Only 2 reviews for the last chapter! :(_

* * *

><p><span>Anger Management<span>

It took Merlin almost an hour to find Arthur; he was in the castle kitchens, for some strange reason. He was constantly moving around the great wooden table that sat in the middle of the kitchen, searching all the cupboards and shelves. The centre table was covered in piles of plates, crumbs loitered everywhere, apple cores were scattered about, and a confused Merlin even spotted a half-eaten pineapple amongst the mess.

"Err…Arthur?"

Arthur turned, clutching a bunch of grapes he had just discovered. "Hmm?"

"What are you doing?" Merlin asked cautiously.

"I had an argument with Gwen again," Arthur said, shovelling grapes into his mouth while still looking for food.

"Err, I'm sorry to hear that Arthur, but that doesn't really explain what you're doing down here," Merlin admitted.

"Well, you said that when I have an argument with someone I should find another way to release my anger other than using you as target practice," Arthur explained, finishing the grapes just as he found a large plate of chicken legs.

"So, you've decided to eat instead?"

Arthur nodded, already half way through a chicken leg.

"You know, maybe you should keep looking for other ways to control your anger," Merlin suggested, "eating so much food can't be good for you. Maybe next time you should try…exercise!"

Arthur stopped eating for a few moments to give Merlin a dangerous glare, a signal that it was time for him to leave and let the Prince over-eat in peace.

I'm sure it isn't much of a surprise to you or Merlin, that Arthur had a stomach ache the next day!


	8. Merlin vs Gravity

_The word for this drabble is 'physics', chosen by Bubblepunk12, who chose the word for one of the other chapters, but I already had a one, so its been slightly delayed. Thank you anyway!_

_Reviews and random words have been really low recently! PLEASE try and keep them up guys! You've probably already worked out how much I love reviews, lol, and it puts me off writing these drabbles if I think no one's reading them or enjoying them! :(_

_Anyway, enjoy this drabble, and don't forget to review! Random words welcome as always! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Merlin vs. Gravity<span>

"Gaius!" Merlin rushed from his room and burst into Gaius' chamber, a clear indication that there was a crisis. "Something's gone very wrong, I—" he never finished his sentence, as there was no need to explain what was going on, it was happening right in front of him.

Gaius looked casually up from the book he was reading. He was sitting in a chair…just, but the chair was no longer on the floor, it was hovering around in mid air, along with everything else in his chamber.

"Yes Merlin I believe I need to hear a reason why I'm suddenly so far away from the floor," Gaius said in a matter-of-fact voice.

"I was just practising some magic, and everything just…"

"Started floating, apart from you?"

Merlin nodded guilty (his feet were still firmly on the floor).

Gaius sighed, turning back to his book. "Well I would tell you not to mess with the laws of physics and make gravity disappear, but then I would be getting a few hundred years ahead of myself." He explained.

There was a pause, in which Merlin wasn't sure what to do other than look confused.

"Just fix it before my head touches the ceiling," Gaius said, his voice a more dangerous tone now.

Merlin nodded hurriedly, before rushing off, narrowly missing being knocked on the head by a floating leach tank on the way.


	9. Spelling Contest

_The word for this drabble is 'super-cali-fragile-istic-expi-ali-docious', chosen by Jedichild. I know that it isn't meant to have hyphens, but it's such a long word fanfiction doesn't recognise it! lol._

_Anyway, hope you enjoy! Reviews are awesome as always! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Spelling Contest<span>

"This is ridiculous," Lancelot commented, his voice bringing Merlin back from the brink of sleep, even though he was in a standing position, leaning against the wall of Gaius' chamber. He yawned, nodding with agreement, and observed the scene before him, which hadn't changed for the past hour.

Arthur and Gwaine were sitting at a table, staring intensely at one-another, a piece of paper in one hand, a quill in the other.

The two had gone through many contests together to see who was the best: fighting, drinking, even dancing! But they still couldn't decide, so now they wanted to have a spelling contest.

So far they had both spelt their words correctly, or in some cases, incorrectly. This was settling nothing, but they were still demanding words, which Merlin and Lancelot were quickly running out of, along with their patience.

But then, Merlin had a thought. He stood up straight and grinned.

"Super-cali-fragile-istic-expi-ali-docious." He said.

Arthur and Gwaine turned their heads to stare at him. "What?" They both said.

Merlin was still grinning. "Spell it."

There was a pause, in which Arthur and Gwaine both looked at each other again.

"Shall we call it a draw?" Gwaine offered.

"Definitely."


	10. The Right Words

_The word for this drabble is 'intoxicating' by Mrs Bonner, so thank you!_

_In chapter 3 I said I might only do 10 chapters of these drabbles, which means that this one is the last one, I'd really like to carry on with these drabbles, but I haven't been getting many readers for them! :( I've had loads of fun writing them (and I hope you've enjoyed reading them!) but I'm wondering if I should carry them on? Or put them on hold, as there are a lot of drabble series out there right now, do we really want one more? _

_So, as you can tell, I'm in a bit of a dilemma about it, as I really would like to carry them on! So I want to ask what you think, I don't want to let my readers down!_

_Anyway, here's hopefully NOT the last chapter in this drabble series, but I hope you enjoy it anyway! And don't forget to review, especially if you want to see more of these drabbles! :)_

* * *

><p><span>The Right Words<span>

It's very difficult go give a speech declaring your love for someone, and despite his massive ego, Arthur was finding this particularly hard. He had decided to tell Gwen how he really felt about her, never mind her status or his father's opinion, he wanted to tell her how he felt, but how could he put his feelings into words? Arthur paced up and down his chamber, trying to think of the right thing to say.

_You make my world come to life? No, too long. You captivate me? No, that just sounds like I stare at her all the time. _Arthur thought to himself, still pacing. _You entrance me? No, if anyone overheard she might get accused of magic again. You…intoxicate me? _Arthur paused. Intoxicate…it sounded like a good word, although didn't it also mean drunk? He'd have to ask Gwaine about that.

Arthur decided to practice saying the word anyway. He closed his eyes, picturing Gwen before him, and said:

"You're intoxicating!"

"Well, thanks!"

Arthur opened his eyes at the horribly familiar voice, to see Merlin standing there, watching him with a huge grin on his face.

"I must admit I'm flattered," Merlin began, trying hard not to laugh. "But—"

Arthur could feel his face burning red as he stormed towards Merlin. "Get out!" He roared, causing Merlin to run for his life.

_Well, intoxicate is definitely out of the question_, Arthur thought to himself, fuming. The last thing he wanted was to picture his servant when he was trying to confess his love to someone!


	11. Shut Up Merlin!

_Hello everyone! I've decided that I'm going to be carrying on with these drabbles! :D I'm so glad you're still enjoying them (as I am) and wanting to read more, your support means a lot to me :)_

_Anyway, the word for this drabble is 'unassuming' by alleywayqueen, so thank you!_

_I hope you all enjoy! Reviews and random words are adored as always! :D _

* * *

><p><span>Shut Up Merlin!<span>

Merlin had been warned that Arthur was in a bad mood today, so naturally he went straight to the Prince to try and annoy him out of his wits.

Arthur was sitting in his chamber, his armour still on as he stared angrily at the wall, so Merlin hummed a happy tune as he walked into his chamber, before tutting and saying:

"You're still angry that you lost that sword fight aren't you?"

Arthur sighed grumpily, it wasn't very often he lost a fight. "I just thought I had the upper hand—" he beagn.

"You know what?" Merlin said, walking around Arthur's chamber and tidying it up, mainly so he could be a safe distance from the Prince. "Maybe you wouldn't be so disappointed when you lost a fight if you were more…unassuming."

"Unassuming?"

"Yeah, you know, modest, humble, less arrogant."

"I know what it means!" Arthur snapped angrily, "and I am modest!"

Merlin chuckled, "really?"

"Yes!"

"But does calling yourself modest make you modest?"

There was a pause, in which Arthur's face held a range of facial expressions, mainly annoyance and confusion, before saying what is always said in such a situation:

"Shut up Merlin!"


	12. Racing

_The word for this drabble is 'unfit' by Mrs Bonner, cheers! :D_

_Hope you all enjoy! Reviews and random words much appreciated, as always!_

* * *

><p><span>Racing<span>

"Sometimes, I just think you two go too far," Gwen commented with a sad sigh, as Merlin and Arthur stood at the steps of the castle, attempting to stretch their limbs.

It had all began when Arthur moaned at Merlin that he was so unfit he couldn't keep up with the hunting party, Merlin complained that he was in a better state than Arthur when it came to fitness, so the two decided to have a race to find out.

"Right then!" Gwaine called out. There was no need to shout, there were only two people racing, and Gwen was the only audience, but he was enjoying his referee role. "The race begins here, at the bottom of the castle steps, and ends at the front door of the tavern. The loser will have to buy me a drink from the tavern."

"What about the winner?" Merlin asked.

Gwaine grinned, "he can buy me a drink as well if he wants. All right then, on your marks—"

"Wait, wait!" Arthur said suddenly. "I haven't got my horse yet!"

"What?" Merlin turned to face his rival; "you can't have a horse, that's against the rules!"

Arthur shrugged, "you didn't say no horses."

"But I'll never win if you're riding a horse!"

"And that's why you're unfit!" Arthur pointed out.

"You're the one sitting down!" Merlin snapped. "No wonder you're getting fat!"

"I am not getting fat! I do exercises every day, you're the one sittibng around doing nothing!"

"Oh _I'm _doing nothing? How do you think your armour gets clean!"

"It doesn't!"

"This is going to last a while," Gwaine sighed, turning to Gwen. "Looks like you're the one buying me a drink!"


	13. Chamber of Madness

_Yay, a quick update! :D The word for this drabble is 'peanuts' by BagginsPotterPevensie. It's one of my longer ones and isn't my best, but I hope you all enjoy it anyway! :)_

_Thanks for all the reviews for the last chapter, please keep them coming! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Chamber of Madness<span>

Gaius watched Merlin with slight disapproval as the young Warlock placed an empty bowl in front of him, he could tell something disastrous would soon occur.

"I've find out a way to fix the food shortages!" Merlin exclaimed excitedly.

"Merlin, the crops are a little late, that's hardly a famine," Gaius pointed out.

"But we'll never have to worry about the lack of food again!" Merlin continued, his enthusiasm building. "I've found a spell to create seeds!"

"Really?"

Merlin nodded, "Watch!" And before Gaius could advise Merlin against it, the Warlock raised his hands above the empty bowl, gold light filling his eyes, and cried out "_Afferte vitae nuces_*!"

Silence. Nothing happened.

Gaius was about to say something, when suddenly,there was a _pop_ and the bowl in front of him burst into peanuts, which scattered across the table.

"Ah, I may have said 'nuts', not seeds…" Merlin began. There were several more _pop_s, and all around him books, glass phials and plates started turning into peanuts, which rolled everywhere. "Oh dear…"

"Have we even discovered peanuts yet?" Gaius asked, watching Merlin run around the chamber, trying to collect up the nuts.

Merlin wasn't sure, but he couldn't reply, as all the books of Gaius' bookshelf were suddenly turning into peanuts, which rained down on him.

"If it's any consolation, nuts can be seeds," Gaius said, just as Merlin slipped over on a peanut and fell to the floor.

Just then, the door opened, and Arthur entered the chamber. "Merlin, what are you—" he began, seeing his manservant on the floor, but then he looked up and saw peanuts tumbling from the shelves, filling the room.

There was a horrible pause.

"I'll come back later." Was all a shocked Arthur said. He quickly turned and hurried out the chamber of madness.

_*meaning 'bring nuts to life'_


	14. Awkward Encounters in the Corridor

_Yay another quick update (make the most of it, they won't last for long!) The word for this drabble is 'lock' by Griffinesque, so thank you!_

_Hope you all enjoy! Reviews much appreciated :)_

* * *

><p><span>Awkward Encounters in the Corridor<span>

Gwen was walking down one of the many corridors within the Camelot walls, when she encountered Arthur crouching down in front of his chamber, a pin in his hand, trying to pick the lock, while muttering something that was probably rude under his breath.

"Err…Arthur?"

Arthur looked up, "Gwen!" He cried, the anger disappearing from his face when he saw her.

"Do I dare ask what you're doing?" Gwen said, doubting if she wanted to know.

"Merlin's being childish," Arthur explained, his anger returning. "He's locked me out of my chamber just because I told him I didn't need him and that I could look after myself!"

"But Arthur…"

"Yes?"

"You're in your underwear…"

Arthur looked down, as if he hadn't noticed. "Ah…yes, that's half my problem! And it would be all fixed if someone let me in!" He yelled the last few words at his door.

Just then, Gwaine strolled into the scene; he stopped beside a quickly going pink Gwen, and looked down at the crouching Arthur.

"Locked out huh?" He asked, in a voice that said he knew exactly how Arthur felt. "I advise you try the window," Gwaine advised as he walked past, leaving Arthur and Gwen exchanging very confused looks.


	15. Drunken Speech

_The word for this drabble is 'holus bolus' (meaning all at once; together) by jedichild, so thank you! :D_

_Unfortunately I won't be able to update for a couple of weeks, as I'm going on holiday! I promise I will try and update once more by the end of August. The first drabble will be 'desecrate' (by LunaShadowWolf13), but suggestions for words after that one will be much appreciated, and you have 2 weeks to think of some real good ones! :D_

_Anyway, have a great couple of weeks everyone! This one isn't one of my best drabbles, but I hope you enjoy it anyway!_

_Please review! :)_

* * *

><p><span>Drunken Speech<span>

Arthur stood in Gaius' chamber, waiting for Merlin. He had been looking for his manservant all day, and had decided he might as well stand around wait for Merlin to come to him instead.

He was fiddling with some liquid-filled test tubes on the table (accidentally dropping one in the process) when the door opened and Gwaine rushed in.

"Good, I hoped I would find someone in here!" he said, "I need some help Arthur."

"With what?" Arthur asked, but his question was answered by some very loud singing, and a grinning Merlin suddenly fell through the door.

"Oh, hello Arthur!" He beamed, leaning against the wall to remain standing.

Arthur was not impressed, he turned to Gwaine. "You got him drunk!"

"I didn't mean to!" Gwaine argued, "how was I supposed to know he was such a light-weight, and took so well to drinking games?"

Merlin managed to retain enough balance to move away from the wall and stumble towards his friends. He swung his arms around Gwaine and Arthur's shoulders, and grinned again. "Isn't it great! Us lot, all holus bolus!"

"Holus what?"

"It means together," Gwaine explained, the expert when it came to drunken speech.

With another giggle, Merlin finally lost his balance, and found himself sitting on the floor between his two friends. "Arthur broke something!" He suddenly shouted, pointing at the smashed glass on the floor, before bursting into fits of laughter.

"All right that's it," Arthur said quickly, as he and Gwaine helped him off the floor. "Time for you to go to bed." He looked over at Gwaine, "holus bolus?"

Gwaine laughed, "holus bolus!" And together they hauled the drunk Merlin into his chamber; both Gwaine and Merlin unaware of how many stables Arthur will order them to clean out the next day.


	16. Spring Cleaning

_Hi everyone! I'm back from my holiday! :D (not that I didn't enjoy my holiday, but it's good to be home again, and to update fanfic!) I hope the wait's not been too long!_

_The word for this drabble is desecrate by LunaShadowWolf13 (like I promised!) so thank you!_

_I hope you all enjoy, reviews = love :)_

* * *

><p><span>Spring Cleaning<span>

Arthur was about to enter his chamber, when he heard a loud and alarming clanging noise from within. Dreading what he was going to find, and with no weapon to protect him, he took a deep breath and pushed the door open…

Merlin was standing in the middle of his chamber, surrounded by, what can only be described as, carnage. Wardrobes and cupboards were hanging open; their contents littered across the chamber. Drawers were scattered on the floor, along with armour, swords and other assortments of clothing. Even the bed had moved from its original position, and by the amount of feathers that were flying everywhere, it looked like a pillow had suffered an injury.

"Merlin!"

Merlin turned around, and beamed. "Hello Arthur! Don't mind me, I'm just doing a bit of spring cleaning."

"Spring…Merlin, it's September!" Arthur roared. "This isn't cleaning! This is destruction, demolition, desecration!"

"My, my, you're learning a lot of 'd' words today Arthur," Merlin told him cheerily.

"Well I've got one for you! You're a di—"

"Look, could you go and desecrate someone else's peace? I'm trying to work!"

Arthur was so furious he couldn't even find the words to argue, he just turned and stormed out. Merlin chuckled to himself; this was a great new way to annoy Arthur! With a flash of gold, the room was restored to its original tidiness, unless Arthur came back, of course.


	17. Knighthood

_The word for this drabble is indefatigable (meaning persisting tirelessly) by momo9momo, so thank you!_

_This isn't one of my best drabbles, but I hope you like it anyway!_

_There is currently a poll on my profile about which TV shows I should write more stories for, so if you think I should write more Merlin, or more of something else, please vote!_

_Reviews much appreciated (and so are votes ;))_

Knighthood

Morgana disappeared with a burst of light, fleeing from Merlin's ball of fire. Arthur gave a great sigh of relief. For a few moments he really thought it was the end. He turned to his manservant.

"Thank you Merlin," he panted, "I don't know how to repay you."

Merlin, not used to thanks, grinned and said. "Can I have a Knighthood?"

Arthur stared. "Uh, no, afraid not Merlin. I can't give you a Knighthood."

Merlin looked slightly disappointed, but being the indefatigable sort, he said "Arthur?"

"Yes?"

"Can I have a Knighthood?"

"Sorry, no."

"Please, please, please, please!"

"No!"

Merlin gave Arthur a few seconds of peace before saying, "Can I gain the status of a Knight instead with a special ceremony?"

"That's the same thing!" Arthur snapped.

"Say Arthur…"

"No you cannot have a Knighthood!"

Another pause, then…

"Arthur, can I have a Knighthood?"

Arthur just glared, but said nothing. Merlin persisted with his question all the way back to Camelot, making Arthur wonder if he should just stop being nice. But he thought he should tell his father of Merlin's brave actions, perhaps Uther could think of a sensible reward.

The look on Arthur's face was priceless when Uther heard the story and said the Merlin: "This requires something very special. You shall have a Knighthood!"


	18. Free Stuff

_The word for this drabble is defenestrate (meaning to throw someone or something out the window!) by Breyerfan123, cheers!_

_The idea for this drabble was actually inspired by a fic about awkward moments by Astiza, where you can also put your own awkward moments, and I decided to use mine for this drabble :) you'll probably be able to work out what the awkward moment was as you read on…_

_For any Doctor Who fans out there, I've just uploaded a little Amy/Rory one shot, please have a read if you're interested and tell me what you think!_

_Anyway, enjoy! And please review! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Free Stuff<span>

Merlin ducked as another goblet came flying towards him. It missed his head and instead went through the open window. This was quickly followed by an apple, which also missed and ended flying out the window.

"You're always embarrassing me Merlin!" Arthur roared, seizing a wooden spoon and chucking it at his manservant.

"I think you're overreacting Arthur," Merlin told him, dodging the spoon. It too went through the window. "And besides, it isn't my fault…"

"Not your fault? Merlin, it was your red shirt! You washed them!"

"Yes, but how was I supposed to know that if I washed my red shirt with all your white shirts they'll come out pink?"

"Everyone knows that Merlin!" Arthur snapped. Some more fruit came flying in Merlin's direction, and ended up falling out the window. "Now what am I supposed to do?"

Merlin shrugged, "it doesn't matter if you wear pink, Gwaine said the colour suits you…"

"Gwaine was also rolling around on the floor laughing! Now what am I going to do? I can't go to meetings or fighting practice wearing pink!"

"Well Arthur, there's no need to assume the stereotype that girls wear pink, besides…"

Merlin never got to finish his sentence, as Arthur had just thrown a pink shirt at him, taking him by surprise, causing him to stumble backwards and fall out the window.

Arthur would have been concerned, and so would have Merlin, if they hadn't been arguing on the ground floor of the castle. Merlin fell to the ground with a thump, and looked up to see Gwaine standing over him, clutching some fruit, a pink shirt and a wooden spoon. He grinned.

"Check it out Merlin!" He said, "free stuff!"


	19. Forgiveness

_The word for this drabble is Xyris by Gina Frodo H. I googled it and it came up with 'yellow-headed flower' or something like that. Hopefully it's the right definition, if not I'll just write another one! :D So I hope it's OK!_

_Unfortunately, I'm starting school tomorrow (my last year ever! AAAAGH!) so I don't know how regularly I'll be able to update. I'm also starting to look at Universities, so it's going to be complete madness! But I promise to update once a week, maybe more!_

_Reviews and random words much appreciated :)_

* * *

><p><span>Forgiveness<span>

Merlin opened his chamber door when he heard someone knocking on it, and found Gwaine standing there, a sorrowful yet friendly look on his face.

"Apparently I got very drunk last night and said some nasty things about you and Arthur," he said.

"You did," Merlin told him. Unlike Gwaine he could remember, and neither him nor Arthur liked to be compared with farm animals. By the smell of his breath and the way he swayed slightly on his feet, it seemed that Gwaine still hadn't even got over the alcohol, or he's had some more…

"So I've come to apologise," Gwaine said, "here." He held out his hand.

There was a pause. "Err, Gwaine, what is this?" Merlin asked.

Gwaine looked down at the yellow-headed flowers in his hand. "They're to apologise, they're called Xyris apparently. It's a type of flower…"

"Yes I know it's a flower," Merlin told him, "but I think it's only women who get given flowers when they're upset."

"Oh," Gwaine looked confused. "But Arthur said I should give flowers to any men I have offended."

Merlin chuckled. "No, I think Arthur might be pulling your leg there to get you into even more trouble."

"Ah…I wonder what Lancelot's going to say when he finds them in his chamber…"

"It's a nice gesture though," Merlin said to try and cheer up the concerned Gwaine. "But I think they're better for bar maids you spill drink over."

"All right then," after a pause Gwaine smiled again, and held out his arms, "how about a kiss instead?"

Merlin's reaction to this new offer was remarkably similar to Arthur's…Gwaine got a door slamming in his face.


	20. April Fool

_The word for this drabble is 'gammon' by Jedichild, which has several different definitions, so in this drabble I tried to combine two of them – deception and smoked ham (and yes, I am well aware how random that sounds!)_

_Please keep the random words coming :) only 2 reviews for the last chapter! :(_

* * *

><p><span>April Fool<span>

"Arthur, Arthur, Arthur!"

"Yes Gwaine, do come in." Arthur said sarcastically, as Gwaine rushed into his chamber. "Don't worry, I wasn't sitting here doing some very important papers, what do you want?"

"It's Merlin," Gwaine explained, a genuine look of concern on his face, which made Arthur sit up with worry. "He encountered a sorcerer in the town, and he cast a spell on him!"

Colour drained from Arthur's face, he had heard that there was a sorcerer somewhere in the City, who knows what trouble he's caused? "What sort of spell?"

"He turned him into a piece of ham!"

There was a pause.

Then Arthur burst out laughing. "You can't be serious?"

"I am!" And Gwaine slammed down on the table a piece of smoked ham, which had a blue neckerchief tied around it. "That's Merlin."

"Please tell me you're joking?" Arthur said slowly.

"I'm not!"

Arthur looked carefully at the harm, and poked it. "Err…Merlin, are you in there?"

There was a muffled giggle from somewhere behind Arthur, and suddenly Merlin jumped up from under his bed. "April Fool!" He cried.

Gwen watched with confusion as suddenly Merlin and Gwaine burst into the corridor, running away from Arthur who was wielding a very large piece of ham, which had a neckerchief tied onto it...


	21. Merlin's Revenge

_The word for this drabble is aeroneurosis (meaning fatigue, tiredness) by bubblepunk12, so thank you! This isn't one of my best, as I found it surprisingly tricky to think of a good drabble, but I hope you enjoy it!_

_Review and random words much appreciated! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Merlin's Revenge<span>

"What do you think we should do with him?"

"Just give a little nudge, a poke, that'll wake him up."

"I don't think he'll be very happy about that though."

"Why don't we just leave him there?"

"We could draw on his face!"

"Ssh Gwaine, keep your voice down! We're not going to draw on his face!"

"What's going on?" Merlin asked, appearing in the courtyard. He had hardly left the castle and peculiar things were happening.

Gwaine, Leon, Lancelot and Percival were standing in a row, dressed in their armour for training, whispering to each other. Lancelot pointed at what was bothering them.

Arthur was standing in front of his Knights, well…almost. The top half of his body was bent over as he leaned his hands and head on the hilt of his sword, which was sticking out of the grass beside him. His eyes were closed and he was snoring a little.

He was fast asleep.

"What are we supposed to do?" Sir Leon whispered hurriedly.

Merlin peered at the Prince a little closer, it seemed that long days of being a Prince and long nights of feasts had finally got to him, and exhaustion had set in.

And what was Merlin going to do about the Prince who had made him work to exhaustion? Had hardly allowed him one lie in for the whole time he had been in Camelot?

Take revenge, of course.

"Get ready to run," Merlin warned the Knights, as he stepped back, preparing himself. The Knights watched with suspicion.

With one, swift kick, Merlin knocked down the sword that was holding Arthur up. The Prince tumbled very comically to the ground.

By the time the first "MERLIN!" was roared, Merlin and the Knights were already fleeing across the courtyard, unable to stifle their laughter as they went.


	22. Kidnapped

_The word for this drabble is loquacious (meaning talkative) by 'a fan', so thank you!_

_This isn't a particularly funny one, but I hope you all enjoy it anyway! (I certainly enjoyed writing it, but then again, I enjoy writing them all! :D)_

_Random words are welcome, but I have quite a few to do so you might have to wait a few chapters before you get your drabble :)_

_Please review!_

Kidnapped

"Cheese. That's a good word isn't it? Cheese. I wonder who decided to call cheese cheese? Gwen told me cheese comes from cow's milk, but that's just stupid. Cheese is yellow as well, and I've never seen a yellow cow, I saw a purple cow once, but that might have been the rum. In fact I've never even seen a cow in Camelot, so where does all the cheese come from? Hopefully not from magic, because if it does Uther would have to ban cheese, and I like cheese, not as much as I like rum though. I've won every drinking competition I've entered and the prize is always rum, or pickled eggs. No idea why that is, but I'm not complaining, hey, it's free stuff! Pickled eggs are all right, I can eat anything that's pickled when I'm having a night out, but they're nothing compared to rum. I could sing songs about rum. Yummy yummy yummy I've got rum in my tummy…"

"Does this man ever shut up?" Morgana groaned, rubbing her temples as her headache grew.

"Well sweetheart, you told me to talk and I'm talking! You should have been more specific!" Gwaine grinned, he had been talking constantly for over an hour, but his spirit was not dampened. "Now, where was I? Oh yes, when it comes to the European government…"

Morgause sighed, "out of all the people in Camelot we could have kidnapped, we had to take _him_!" No wonder someone shouted 'good luck' to her and Morgana as they dragged a snoring Gwaine away from Camelot.

Gwaine suddenly paused, giving the sisters a cheeky smile and a wink. "Well ladies, it's getting pretty cold in this cell, fancy giving me a bit of company for the night?"

Two minutes later, Gwaine walked free from Cenred's castle, humming to himself. Apparently being stuck with someone as talkative and suggestive as him led to his kidnapers feeling like victims themselves and had set him free!

He smiled to himself, works every time!


	23. Uther's Banned Goats

_The word for this drabble is insouciant (meaning unconcerned, careless) by Astiza, cheers!_

_I don't know if this information is correct, but I have heard that Merlin is returning to our screens on 1__st__ October! :D The trailer's already on you tube! I cannot wait! :D_

_Reviews and random words are awesome :)_

* * *

><p><span>Uther's Banned Goats<span>

Merlin found Arthur in his chamber, leaning back in his chair, feet resting on the table. For the first time in days, he looked totally relaxed.

"Nope, everything's fine Merlin," Arthur said when Merlin asked if there was anything the matter. "In fact, nothing's going to bother me today, Gaius said I should stop worrying so much, and that is exactly what I'm going to do!"

Not if Merlin could help it.

"Oh, well, I just came to say that I forgot to clean your armour for today Arthur," Merlin said sadly.

Amazingly, the Prince shrugged. "Never mind, it'll get dirty again anyway."

Clearly Merlin was going to have to try harder than that.

"Gwaine's been arrested."

"Wouldn't be the first time," Arthur said, smiling in amusement.

"Uther's banned goats."

"Never liked those animals myself."

Merlin paused, annoyed. Arthur just…didn't care any more! Nothing seemed to annoy him, not even his manservant attempting to annoy him. There had to be something that Arthur would care about enough to…

Suddenly, Merlin grinned.

"I've kissed Gwen."

Arthur froze. His eyes grew as wide as saucers as the colour drained from his face and then returned a bright red colour. "What?" He said between gritted teeth.

"Remember when I got poisoned? Well, Gwen was very worried about me, and was so pleased when I got better that she gave me a kiss…" He stopped when he saw that Arthur's face had gone purple.

The rest of Merlin's day, consisted of him being chased around the castle by a suddenly very angry and stressful Prince.


	24. Hide and Seek

_The word for this drabble is bellwether (meaning the leader of a group or activity) by Jedichild, so thank you!_

_Hope you all enjoy the drabble, don't forget to review and give a random word! :D_

Hide and Seek

"This is humiliating," Arthur groaned.

"This was your idea!" Sir Percival pointed out.

Arthur and his Knights were standing in a row, ready to be addressed by their new leader. It had been Arthur's idea that each day a Knight took charge on a task of their choice, to help them gain skills. However Arthur had forgotten that one of the bellwethers would have to be…

"OK, who wants to invade a forest!"

Gwaine.

The Knights shifted under the gaze of their new, grinning leader, and wondered what to think of this statement. Eventually Arthur, feeling more embarrassed by the second, raised a hand.

"Yes, the one with the massive ego!" Said Gwaine.

Arthur glared, "would you care to explain _how _we're going to invade a forest?"

"Well, we're not invading, I just wanted to sound dramatic. We're going into the forest to find someone, a search and rescue mission you might like to call it!"

Lancelot raised a hand.

"Yes, the one with the girl issues."

"So is it just a game of hide and seek?" He asked.

Gwaine beamed, "I suppose so, what fun!"

"Who are we seeking?"

"Someone who you may have realised was missing…" Gwaine winked.

There was a pause. "You've kidnapped Sir Leon and left him in a forest haven't you?" Arthur groaned.

Gwaine looked uncomfortable, "maybe…"

And so Arthur and his men spent the next four hours 'seeking' Sir Leon (Merlin came along half way through, and was allowed to watch Knights falling into ditches and trying to climb up trees), before Gwaine realised he had taken them to the wrong forest.


	25. Good Deed

_The word for this drabble is another one from Jedichild, this one being 'nihility' (meaning literally, nothing) so thank you again!_

_I have a slight issue in this chapter, as I've used the word 'boyfriend' but I don't think the word suits the time Merlin's set in, if that makes sense…but I didn't know what other word to use! If you think I should use a different word please suggest what and I will change it :)_

_I thought I'd do 50 chapters for this Random Words fic, which means we are half way through! Which is great and sad at the same time! Anyway, thank you everyone who have reviewed and given random words so far, please keep them coming! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Good Deed<span>

Arthur was worried about Gwen. This wasn't unusual, in fact he worried about everyone (not that he'd admit that) but today, he was concerned that he hadn't been a very good boyfriend to her these last couples of days. So he decided to go and talk to her, see if there was any good deed he could do.

"Is everything all right Gwen?" Arthur asked when he found her, giving a textbook-Arthur smile.

Gwen smiled shyly. "Yes, thank you Arthur." She said.

"Are you sure? Is there anything you'd like to talk about?" Arthur suggested, waiting for his 'good boyfriend' role to come into play.

"No Arthur, everything's fine."

"Are you sure?" He sounded disappointed. "There's nothing bothering at all? Nothing I can do for you?"

"No," Gwen said, slightly annoyed by Arthur's reaction.

The Prince smiled again, "come on, there must be something bothering you!"

"No, there's nothing."

Unfortunately, Arthur wouldn't take 'no' or 'nothing' for an answer, and spent the rest of the day following Gwen around, asking constantly if anything was bothering her.

"Are you missing Morgana?"

"I always miss Morgana!"

"Is work getting too much?"

"Work's fine!"

"Has a magical creature tried to eat you?"

"What? No!"

By the end of the day, Arthur stood in the doorway of Gwen's house, looking tired and annoyed. "Come on," he said, "there must be something the matter."

Gwen sighed, "yes actually."

Arthur immediately brightened up. "Really?"

"Yes, I've had an annoying prat following me around all day asking me silly questions, and it's really getting on my nerves! Would you like to fix that?"

Arthur grinned, "I'll get Merlin right onto it!"

His thanks was a door slamming in his face, though Arthur couldn't fathom why…


	26. Maths Lesson of Doom

_Sorry about the slightly delayed update, been really busy and stressed out! _

_Anyway, the word for this drabble is 'discombobulated' by Astiza. I had a choice between that and probabaly an easier word to use, but discombobulate is an awesome word, who can resist? So thank you!_

_I've found recently that the same people seem to be giving me random words. There's nothing wrong with that; they give great words, but everyone else? What are you waiting for? Random words are such fun! :D_

_Not really historically accurate this drabble, but neither's the show, so we'll call it even :)_

_Please review!_

* * *

><p><span>Maths Lesson of Doom<span>

"I'm so confused!" Gwaine yelled for what felt like the hundredth time. He leaned over towards Percival, who was sitting beside him. The Knight had written an all manner of shapes and equations on a piece of parchment.

This did not please Gwaine.

"See, he gets it! Why can't I?"

Percy just smiled, while Elyan, sitting on the other side of Percival, rolled his eyes.

Gaius tutted. "You should pay more attention Gwaine."

"A bird flew past the window, I had to watch!"

Gaius sighed. He was quickly regretting offering lessons to Knights, and Gwaine was on another rant again.

"Arthur's not here, or Lancelot, or Leon! Why do they get away without doing maths?"

"Because they decided to do history," Gaius reminded him.

"Well, that probably won't get me women or free ale either!"

Elyan rolled his eyes again. "Just explain to use once more Gaius."

Gaius nodded. "It's quite simple. If you want to find the size of an angle in a pie chart all you have to do is divide the frequency by the total frequency and multiply by 360 degrees."

Gwaine stared. "OK, all I heard was pie and degrees. Are you sure this isn't a cookery lesson?"

"No!" Gaius snapped, Elyan thumped his head on the table.

"I just don't get it!" Gwaine moaned. "Why is it called pie anyway? That just makes me hungry. No matter how many times someone tries to explain it I get so, so…"

"Discombobulated?" Percival offered the word.

"Is that another mathematical equation?" Gwaine stared in horror.

"Right, that's it!" Elyan stood up suddenly. "We're having a break, let's all go to the tavern to cool off and try to start again."

"Oh thank goodness, I was running out of things to live for!" Gwaine leaped up and dashed out of the chamber, before anyone could point out that alcohol would just make him feel more discombobulated…


	27. Rain That's Given Up Trying

_Thanks for all the random words from the last chapter guys! :D I have loads to work on now, which is great! Keep 'em coming! :D_

_Oh and I forgot to mention in the last chapter – we've passed 100 reviews everyone! :D Hooray! Thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far! Please keep them up! :D_

_Anyway, the word for this drabble is 'mizzle' (meaning drizzle) by jedichild, so thank you! Although I warn that this drabble is total silliness, more than usual perhaps…_

_Just one more day until Merlin series 4 begins! Cannot wait! :D But I won't put in any spoilers in my drabbles for those who won't see it yet :)_

* * *

><p><span>Rain That's Given Up Trying<span>

Arthur stepped out from the castle into the wet. It had been raining on and off all day, and as he looked up at the gloomy sky, it began to drizzle again.

He sighed to Merlin, who was standing beside him. "I hate mizzle," he grumbled.

Merlin nodded, "I aggrizzle."

The Prince gave his manservant a funny look. "What?"

"What? You can make up 'izzle' words and I cant?"

"Mizzle is a word!"

"And now is aggrizzle, okizzle?"

Arthur rolled his eyes. It was going to be one of those days when everything drove him up the wall – Merlin, the mizzle (which he was sure was a word!) but before he could assure himself that it could be worse…

"Did someone say something's a-sizzling?"

Gwaine had just appeared.

"We were just talking about the mizzle." Merlin explained.

"No kizzle?"

Arthur groaned, he could feel the 'izzle' words bouncing through his skull already, and it probably wouldn't be long until he snapped. When he becomes King he'd have to ban all 'izzle' words, and anyone who said one would end up prizzl…

Damn it!

"…Yes, but what is it a bizzle?"

"Right, that's it!" Arthur snapped suddenly, interrupting Merlin and Gwaine's conversation. "I'm going to throw knives at some targets!" And he stormed off through what he had decided to rename 'rain that's given up trying.'

Merlin tutted, "That Prince needs to chizzle."

Gwaine nodded as he stared up at the rain, "I agrizzle my frizzle."


	28. RIP Possibly

_The word for this drabble is 'regicide' by BagginsPotterPevensie, it means to kill the King…and I have to make that humorous…that's not hard at all! Lol, I have tried my best!_

_Merlin series 4 is already off to an awesome start by the way :) love it!_

_For anyone who may be interested, I just wrote a little Doctor Who one shot for the end of the series, please have a read and tell me what you think!_

_Reviews and random words much appreciated :)_

* * *

><p><span>RIP…Possibly<span>

The Great Dragon swooped over head; his enormous wings stretched out as he gently glided to the ground and stood patiently in front of Merlin.

"You summoned me young Warlock?" He said, looking around at the bare and empty field Merlin usually went to when he needed to talk to Killgarrah.

The young Warlock took a deep breath, and blinked back the tears. This was the hardest thing he'd ever had to say in his life. "Arthur's dead."

Surprisingly, the Great Dragon didn't seem shocked, upset or angry. He simply said "Really?"

"Yes!" Merlin snapped, furious at the Dragon's reaction. "He didn't appear for breakfast, and when I went to see him he wouldn't wake up! What can I do? And why don't you care!"

Killgarrah sighed, "I do care Merlin, but I know everything about you and Arthur's destiny, and I can assure you, this is not the day he dies."

"Oh," Merlin looked a little confused.

"Are you sure he hadn't just overslept? You always complained it was difficult to wake him up in the mornings."

"Ah," Merlin looked a little embarrassed and uneasy now. "That could be the case…"

"You also came to me last week saying Arthur had suffered a terrible fall and may never be able to walk again, when it turned out he just twisted his ankle."

Merlin was finding it very hard to keep eye contact with the Dragon now. "Maybe I should…"

"Double check?"

"Yeah…be right back…" and Merlin hurried off across the field, as Killgarrah tutted to himself.

An hour later, a very embarrassed Merlin returned. "Yeah…he's alive, but maybe not for long…"

"Why not?"

"Well, he gave everyone a pretty big scare when he didn't wake up, and now it turns out he's all right, Gwen's trying to kill him."

Killgarrah couldn't help but chuckle. "Poor Gwen."

"No, poor Arthur!"


	29. The Merlin Show

_The word for this drabble is 'polyamorous' (loving more than one person at once) by anonymous, so thank you!_

_The idea for this drabble sounded good in my head, but when I came to write it I realised it wasn't very good for a drabble, but I hope you like it anyway!_

_Please review :)_

* * *

><p><span>The Merlin Show<span>

The most embarrassed people in Camelot, one bright afternoon, were Arthur, Gwen and Lancelot. Gwen had her head in her hands, Arthur was sulking and Lancelot looked like he wanted to run away. The three of them were sitting on chairs in the courtyard in front of the rest of the Knights. When Merlin appeared, the Knights clapped and cheered.

Merlin grinned, "Hello everyone! And welcome to The Merlin Show!"

"Merlin, this really isn't…"

"I'm sorry, is this called the Arthur Show?"

Arthur glowered, "No."

"Then don't interrupt!"

"But how is a chat show going to help?"

"Morgana said in the future lots of people will do this in the future to solve their problems."

"How would Morgana know?"

"Because she…never mind, that topic's coming up next. But first!" Merlin turned back to the 'audience' "we will be looking at polyamorous! Can people be in love with more than one person? Gwen, what do you think?"

"Yes."

Arthur and Lancelot looked horrified as they both said, "No!"

"Fight, fight, fight!" Said a voice from the audience.

"Calm down Gwaine!" Merlin snapped.

Arthur turned to Gwen, "I can't love you knowing you love someone else, you'll have to choose."

Gwen wasn't impressed. "You can't make me make such a decision Arthur!" And before Merlin could say anything, she had jumped up and stormed off.

The audience 'oohed'.

Sighing, Merlin turned back to Lancelot and Arthur. "Well, perhaps you two should choose—"

"Hang on!" Cried a voice, and Elyan came out of the audience. "No one treats my sister like property they can pick and chose!"

"And what right do you have?" Lancelot demanded.

It didn't take long after that for a full-blown argument to occur between the three men, while the audience cheered them on. Merlin quickly escaped from his own show, before everyone started swording fight again.


	30. The Evil Plan

_The word for this drabble is 'insidious' by Agent iz hyper, so thank you!_

_My apologies to those who are waiting to have their word used, I have quite a back log! If you want to know which chapter you're drabble will be, feel free to ask :) I have put them all in a list!_

_Anyway, enjoy! :D_

* * *

><p><span>The Evil Plan<span>

The tunnel was cold, damp and dark. Merlin swallowed nervously as he walked through the apprehensive gloom. You could meet anyone down here…or anything, monsters lurking around a corner, an evil murderer plotting…

"Ow!"

Or a Morgana you could walk straight into.

"Merlin!" Morgana hissed, rubbing her nose that the young Warlock had just head-butted. "What are you doing down here?"

"I was about to ask you the same question!" Merlin said, shocked to see her. But then realisation dawned on him, and he rolled his eyes. "Oh let me guess, you're forming an evil plan?"

Morgana stared in horror. "How did you…" but before she could finish, Morgause appeared out of the darkness.

"Sister," she said hurriedly, "there is no time to stand around, we must…" but then she spotted Merlin. "Oh."

Merlin smiled, "Yes, 'oh', now what evil plan are we up to today sisters?"

Morgause gasped. "How did he know?"

Merlin shrugged. "You don't seem to get up to much else. What is it this time? Find some immortal beings to attack Camelot? Kidnap someone? Or just good old-fashioned kill Uther? Did you bring Mordred along as well so he could get some work experience?"

"Oh come on!" Said a sudden voice, and a grumpy-looking Mordred appeared from the shadows. "How did he know that part? No one's meant to know about our insidious alliance!"

Merlin sighed and shook his head. "You guys need to go back to the drawing board, think of something more original, treacherous, subtle."

The so-called 'insidious' gang were so shocked that they were being given advice on how to be evil by Arthur's manservant, they simply stared at him, allowing Merlin to walk away.

"Give me a shout when you've got some better ideas!" He called over his shoulder as he disappeared down the tunnel.


	31. Health and Safety

_The word for this drabble is 'catapult' by AlwaysWatching96, so thank you!_

_If anyone's interested, I've just posted a little Mergana one-shot (which may possibly become a two-shot) please have a read and tell me what you think! :D_

_Reviews are awesome! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Health and Safety<span>

Merlin, Gwen, Gaius and a few of the knights were gathered around an impressed-looking Arthur in the courtyard, a huge object covered with a sheet stood behind him.

"Today," Arthur announced, "I shall reveal Camelot's new weapon, a machine that will defend our land against armies and destroy the castles of enemies. It is," he turned and pulled the sheet away from the machine. "A catapult!"

Even Merlin couldn't help feeling impressed by the enormous wooden structure that stood before them. It was a great new feat of engineering for Camelot! While Arthur was discussing how it worked with a few of the Knights, a familiar voice and person came bounding into the courtyard, making Merlin to grin and others roll their eyes.

"What's this social gathering for? I hope I'm not missing a party!" Gwaine said.

"No," Arthur said patiently, "I was just…"

"Oh, what's this?" Gwaine had spotted the catapult.

"It's nothing it's just…Gwaine what are you doing? Get down!" But Gwaine had already clambered onto the catapult and was jumping up and down excitedly.

"This looks like fun!" He exclaimed, "what's it for?"

"Throwing things!" Merlin called up at him.

Gwaine's eyes widened with excitement. "Really?"

"Yes and it's very dangerous so get down!" Arthur snapped.

Gwaine chuckled as he continued to bounce on the catapult. "So much health and safety these days, you need to relax Arthur! I'm sure it's perfectly ssAAAAAAAAFFE!"

The catapult had suddenly launched, throwing Gwaine up into the air. The people around gasped as they watched the Knight, with his arms and legs flailing, get hurled into the distance and disappear behind the hills.

Arthur gazed at the horizon; he could still faintly hear the "weee!" of a flying Knight. There was silence as people weren't sure whether to laugh or panic. Finally Merlin spoke:

"Any idea where he's gone?"

"Looks like…Cenred's Kingdom," Arthur said, he sighed. "Oh well, I'm sure they'll return him again."

After that a new health and safety measure was put in place – never let Gwaine near a catapult.


	32. Pictionary

_The word for this drabble is 'troglodyte' (meaning cave dweller) by Astiza, which is an awesome word, but turns out a tricky word to use for a drabble, so I hope it's ok!_

_And to anyone who's interested - my Mergana fic 'What Have You Done' is going to become a two-shot! :D Hopefully the update will be appearing soon!_

_Please review! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Pictionary<span>

"Come on Merlin, it's quite simple!"

"Errr…" Merlin squinted at the picture Arthur was jabbing his finger at. The rain outside was constantly tapping on the ground and proving an annoying distraction, and his tired brain felt like mush. "Someone's fallen into a large bowl?"

"What? No!"

Sitting on the cold cave floor, Merlin stared at Arthur's drawing. It looked like a stick man sitting in a big circle, what was that supposed to mean?

"How Gwaine would react if Uther banned taverns?"

Arthur had to check the drawing himself to work out Merlin's interpretation. "How does that work?" He questioned.

"Well, he looks a little sad…oh! Is it how you really feel inside?"

"No!" Arthur sighed irritably, "it's obvious Merlin! It's a person sitting in a cave, like what we're doing right now!"

Merlin still looked confused. Arthur sighed again, he only suggested the game to speed up the hours the two of them had to sit through in the cave while they waited for the rain to stop, but it was having the opposite affect.

"Your turn," he said, rubbing his drawing roughly off the wall and tossing Merlin a piece of chalk, before sitting in the corner muttering something about Merlin being "a troglodyte."

At this, Merlin turned, "That's not fair Arthur!" He exclaimed, "I can't use words I don't know! What is a troglodyte anyway?"

Arthur opened his mouth to suggest he drew a picture to explain, but thought better of it. He didn't want to make the night feel any longer.


	33. Gwaine the Alchemist

_The word for this drabble is votary (someone who is devoted to some pursuit, worship, or study) by Jedichild, so thank you!_

_Sorry about the delay for this chapter, I've been working on my other Merlin fanfic and school's been really busy. I also struggled with this word quite a lot, so I hope it's ok!_

_Only two reviews for the last chapter! :(_

Gwaine the Alchemist_  
><em>

As Arthur entered Gaius' chambers, the first thing he saw was great plumes of bright green smoke filling his vision, smelling of rotten eggs. He coughed loudly, covering his noise and mouth with his hand, eyes watering.

"Don't worry!" Said a familiar Knight's voice within the smoke. "You get used to the smell!"

"Gwaine?" Arthur coughed.

The smoke steadily cleared to reveal Gwaine sitting at Gaius' work bench, surrounded by phials and test tubes, a small fire sat under a wooden bowl filled with green-coloured powder, which was creating the green smoke.

Gwaine looked up and grinned. "Arthur! Fancy you dropping by!"

"I thought I should seeming as you haven't been at fighting practice for three days," Arthur said, "what are you doing?"

"Fighting can wait," Gwaine said casually. "I've found something more important to study!"

This did not sound good. Arthur rolled his eyes, "ok, I have to ask, what are you 'studying'?"

Gwaine grinned maniacally "how make gold!"

Arthur gave his textbook 'I think you've gone insane' look, before saying, "right…and what does Gaius think of this?"

"Well, he got a bit of a shock at first, now he's just decided to live somewhere else for a little bit, at least until the smell goes away," Gwaine explained absent-mindedly.

"And how long is it going to take you to make gold?"

"Oh five, ten years?" Gwaine shrugged, only half listening to Arthur, he was too busy exmaning two phials, one filled with bright blue liquid, the other red, before deciding to mix the two together.

There was a hissing sound as the liquids reacted, then a loud bang and a puff of yellow smoke, which cleared to show a rather shocked-looking Gwaine with a blackened face and burnt hair.

"You know what?" Arthur said after a shocked silence, "I think it'd be safer to be a knight."


	34. Apple OF DOOM

_The word for this drabble is 'gobble' by Katty (anonymous) and inspired by Astiza's awkward moments fanfic, which has apples OF DOOM (capitals required). It's a little something for those who are watching series 4 (has the series been awesome so far or has it been awesome?) For those who haven't seen it yet, don't worry, it's not a major spoiler, only that you'll know when there's an apple on screen, something very bad will happen…_

_Anyway, hope you enjoy! And please review! :)_

* * *

><p><span>Apple OF DOOM<span>

Arthur sat down at the table in his chamber, and stared at the piece of parchment before him, as blank as his mind. He was dreadful at writing speeches; he never knew what to say. He just needed some peace and quiet, time to think…

"_Crunch, munch, chomp chomp…"_

"Merlin!"

Merlin, who was sitting on the opposite side of the table surrounded by food, looked up. "What?" He demanded, his mouth full of food.

"Must you do that?"

"Well, you said you didn't want lunch, and I hate seeing food go to waste!"

Arthur sighed, "Yes I know, but can't you eat later, or quietly?"

There was a pause while Merlin tried to think of a suitable explanation, before just saying "No" and turning back to the food.

Arthur glared at his piece of parchment again, how could he concentrate with so much noise? All this munching, chewing and gobbling. But he needed Merlin to help with his speech! So how could he get him to stop eating? Arthur looked up just as Merlin was turning on a bowl of fruit.

"No!"

Merlin was about to bite into an apple, but froze when he saw the terror on Arthur's face.

"What's wrong?"

"You can't eat that, it's the apple OF DOOM!"

Merlin stared. "The what?"

"If you eat the apple OF DOOM, you will place a curse on Camelot and terrible things will happen."

Merlin looked down at the apple OF supposed DOOM, a little concerned now. "But why is it in your fruit bowl?"

"Well someone's got to keep an eye on it," Arthur explained casually. "Now put that apple down before darkness falls on us all!"

Merlin dropped the apple.

Arthur smiled, "good. Now, help me with my speech."

For once, Merlin did what he was told, as in a place like Camelot; you couldn't take any chances.


	35. Lacking in Evil Laughs

_The word for this drabble is 'abnegate' (to give up) by Dragonanzar, so thank you!_

_Hope you all enjoy! I've still got quite a backlog of random words, so I apologise to those who are still waiting, but they will come!_

_I'm not sure about the title or how this one ended, if you have any ideas to improve it feel free to suggest them!_

_Reviews make my day :)_

* * *

><p><span>Lacking in Evil Laughs<span>

Merlin and Morgana stood, face to face, staring at each other, determination and anger in their eyes. Merlin had a feeling this day would come – a duel between good and evil, powerful witch versus powerful wizard. He could feel his magic tingling in his fingers waiting, ready, to be used.

Then suddenly, Morgana sighed.

"You know what?" She said, moving over to sit on Cenred's empty throne. "I give up."

Merlin stared, "what?"

"It's all this effort," Morgana complained. "All this practising magic and evil plotting, it never ever works! I might as well surrender to save time."

Was Merlin really hearing her correctly? If he was, that meant he had come all the way to Cenred's Kingdom for nothing! But, probably more importantly, Camelot had just lost a deadly enemy. But he needed to be sure.

"What will Morgause say?"

Morgana shrugged, "to be honest, I think she's been getting a bit fed up with this whole evil malarkey as well. As long as she's got eyeliner she's happy. Besides, I'm not really evil, just confused, and I can't even do an evil laugh! I just smirk a lot."

"So you're really giving up this whole traitor thing?"

"Really," Morgana smiled.

There was a pause, then Merlin gave a knowing smile.

"Err, Morgana?"

"Yes?"

"I can see the dagger you're hiding up your sleeve."

Morgana's face fell, "Oh." There was an awkward pause. "So I guess…that whole speech about giving up on being evil hasn't worked?"

Merlin gave a sad smile. "Afraid so. Why don't you have a re-think your tactics and I'll come back next week?"

Morgana nodded, "good idea."

"And work on that evil laugh as well!" Merlin called over his shoulder as he left.


	36. Land of the Gwaine

_The word for this drabble is 'endemic' (meaning belonging exclusively to a particular place) by Jedichild, cheers!_

_Wow, I think this is my longest drabble yet! And the weirdest, but it was a tricky word to work on!_

_And I have big news for my book I'm working on called Poppy Girl: my cousin has made a video advertising it for when I put it on the kindle and it's now up on youtube! :D Look on my profile for the link and to find out more about Poppy Girl! :)_

_Anyway, enjoy the drabble! And please review :)_

* * *

><p><span>Land of the Gwaine<span>

"There's no way of denying it Arthur," Merlin moaned, "we're lost! We've wandered into another part of the English countryside that wasn't there before and now we're lost!"

"Calm down Merlin," Arthur snapped as the two of them made their way down yet another hill. "I think I know where we are…"

The two travelled across a grassy plane, through a small wood and up another hill when they found a small gathering of buildings below them. Arthur and Merlin could just make out the small figures of people bustling about, and some distant singing.

"I had a feeling we were here," Arthur murmured.

"We're where?"

"This Merlin, is where our loveable Gwaine comes from, this, is Rum Town."

With that Merlin and Arthur travelled down the hill and entered Rum Town. Merlin gazed around in wonderment at the people talking, laughing and drinking. All the men had beards and long dark hair just like Gwaine, while the women looked like the stereotype of barmaids: large, red-faced, busty and jolly. Every other building was a tavern.

"Wow, I never realised Gwaine was an endemic," Merlin commented as he and Arthur walked through the town. "Makes sense really, I had a feeling there couldn't just be one person like Gwaine in the world."

"The world would be a lot safer place if there was just one," Arthur said, as he watched some Gwaine look-alikes try to fling themselves off a catapult, while others sat around watching and eating apples.

It turned out that Arthur was right, the world probably would be a safer place, and after twenty minutes Merlin was annoyed of having to run from tavern fights, sword fights and bad singing.

"You know what?" He said to Arthur, "as much as I like free mead, I'd feel a lot safer lost out in the wilderness rather than stuck in Gwaine land."

"I couldn't agree more," Arthur admitted as a group of Gwaines started singing again. "Thank God they just come from the one place!"

And with that, the two ran off before any Gwaines took too much interested in the strangers and why they were running away.

Perhaps next time they should go to Percival Town, at least that would be quieter.


	37. Sunbathing and Sandcastles

_The word for this drabble is ammophilious (sand loving) by The Amazing Reviewer (anonymous) so thank you!_

_If anyone is interested I have started to re-edit my Sherlock story Footsteps of a Dead Man, the first 6 re-edited chapters are up, feel free to have a read! :)_

_Time is ticking ever closer to getting my book up on the kindle! And Astiza has made some incredible front covers for it! They're on the Poppy Girl facebook page! (see profile) :D_

_Please review!_

* * *

><p><span>Sunbathing and Sandcastles<span>

Most of the Knights of Camelot had never been to the beach before, their jobs mainly required them to stay in cities and get lost in woods, not go to the seaside. Arthur should have therefore thought about how they would react when, on travelling to a neighbouring Kingdom, he, the Knights and Merlin, stumbled across a beach.

The Knights stopped and stared blissfully at the peaceful scene; waves gently lapped on the shore and the sun beat down on golden sand. Why had no one told them about this place before? Arthur, in the meantime, was getting a little confused by their expression of wonder.

"Err…if you want to stop here to some rest for a while, then we can," he said slowly. He looked around the grassy bank they stood on. "And I think when we start travelling once again we should continue go West—"

There was the sound of scampering behind him, and Arthur turned back to find his Knights had all moved onto the beach and were lying in a row on the sand, sunbathing. Merlin was building a sandcastle.

Arthur stared. "What are you doing?" He demanded.

Elyan shrugged casually, "enjoying the beach, what does it look like?"

"But we have work to do…Sir Leon, where did you get the sunglasses from?"

Leon just smiled and handed Percival the sun cream.

"Anyone want to make a miniature Camelot with me?" Merlin asked.

"Yeah!" Lancelot and Gwaine leapt up and rushed over to help Merlin build his sand city, while the others continued to sunbathe.

Arthur glared. "Are we going to carry on during our duty for the _real_ Camelot or are we just going to sit in the sand all day?"

"Sand." Elyan replied.

Arthur snorted and stormed off, muttering under his breath.

But it wasn't long before the Prince returned to the beach. After all, Gwaine had the map (which was now probably buried) and how many opportunities did a Knight of Camelot have to spend a day on the beach?


	38. Holiday

_The word for this drabble is 'China' by wisdomgoddess26, so thank you!_

_November is a really busy month for me, so updates won't be so frequent, I even have a trip to Auschwitz next week! _

_Only two reviews for the last chapter :(_

* * *

><p><span>Holiday<span>

Some people thought that Arthur didn't care about his manservant, he was just someone to clean up the mess he left behind. But Gwen knew better, especially when she saw Arthur's reaction when Merlin demanded a holiday.

"Merlin my shoes need polishing, Merlin you have to clean my armour again, Merlin you need to wash this shirt, Merlin you've got to—"

"Enough with the Merlins!" A frustrated Merlin suddenly burst out.

Arthur looked up, as if he had only just noticed that a very stressed-looking manservant was in his chamber. "Sorry, would you like me to call you clotpole instead?"

Merlin took a deep breath. "No, I just…Arthur, I think I need a holiday."

"But servants don't take holidays."

"This one does."

The Prince looked confused, and a little bit upset. "Where are you going to go?"

Merlin quickly thought of a country that sounded very far away from Camelot. "China."

"China? Merlin, has China been discovered yet?"

"It has now," Merlin said matter-of-factly. "Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to go and pack."

Arthur couldn't hide his worry now; he jumped out of his chair. "But you can't go to China!"

"Why not?"

"There are…there are giant bears, fierce creatures that will kill you and eat you!"

"Arthur, pandas are very cute and they eat bamboo."

"But…everyone speaks Chinese!"

"I'm a fast learner."

"They say they're dragons there!"

"Surprisingly Arthur, I'm OK with dragons."

But Arthur wouldn't have it. He spent the rest of the day chasing Merlin around trying to persuade him not to leave, after all, who was going to wash his socks when he was gone?

It was when Gwen saw Arthur chasing Merlin down the corridor, shouting something about pandas mistaking his neckerchief for bamboo, that she knew socks had nothing to do with it, Arthur just didn't want people to know he would miss his friend.


	39. Adventures of the Unlikley Warlock

_The word for this drabble is 'pseudonym' (pen-name) by Ranger Maestro, so thank you!_

_To those who have seen 4x06 of Merlin – how amazing was that episode? I loved it! I missed it when it was shown on Saturday (was in London seeing Evanesence! :D) and ended up watching it twice on Sunday it was that awesome! :D_

_Anyway, hope you enjoy the drabble! Reviews are as awesome as 4x06 XD_

* * *

><p><span>Adventures of the Unlikely Warlock<span>

Merlin looked round when he heard the Prince chuckle, and saw Arthur sitting in his chair, reading a book.

"A good read Sire?" Merlin asked politely when he saw the Title of the book – 'Adventures of the Unlikely Warlock'.

"Definitely," Arthur grinned, "Although I have to admit I don't like this character Prince Arty. He's so arrogant and bossy, and rude, he never says thank you to the servants!"

Merlin grinned to himself as he tidied away some of Arthur's clothes. "So you think he'll make a bad King when he's older?"

"Oh I'm sure he'll be fine, it'll all work out in the end, and with that maid Gwenla, why can't he just tell her how he really feels?"

"Some people are just like that Sire." Merlin sighed.

"Odd names in this book though," Arthur continued. "Like Arty, Gwenla and Emrys, the main character."

"And what do you think of him?" Merlin couldn't help asking.

Arthur shrugged, "he's alright."

This was not the answer Merlin was expecting. "Is that it? He's 'alright'?"

"Well, he's a good man, friendly, caring, loyal and all that. He even gives the impression that magic can be used for good but," Arthur paused, "he's just not very…manly."

For some reason, this response annoyed Merlin. "What? He is!"

Arthur couldn't understand why Merlin was acting as if he had just been insulted, "Calm down! He's just a bit of a coward."

"I think he's braver than you think!"

"Why do you say that?"

Merlin went a little quiet, "I just…I've read it before."

"Hmm," Arthur was confused, but decided to let it pass. He looked at the front of the book, "strange author's name as well, Dragoon the Great. Where have I heard that from?"

Merlin shrugged as casually as he could, "Could have been anywhere Sire, may not even be the author's real name, some just use a pseudonym."

"Good point," Arthur said as he went back to his book, missing Merlin's mischievous grin. What would the Prince say if he found out the author was in that very room?


	40. Noble Steed

_The word for this drabble is 'hippopotamus' by Random Google, so thank you! _

_Sorry for the delayed update, been unbelievably busy this week, I had a trip to Auschwitz, which was indescribable, and I went to see Within Temptation, who were incredible! :D_

_Oh, and the front cover of Poppy Girl only needs a tiny bit of tweeking, then the story is going on the kindle! :D Don't forget to like my fb page for that VERY important update! (see profile)_

_Anyway, hope you enjoy the drabble! Please review! :)_

* * *

><p><span>Noble Steed<span>

"What I can't understand is how no one noticed it in the first place."

"But how did it even get here?"

"I've not seen anything like it before."

"We should call it Arthur!"

Arthur glared at Merlin when he said this, and rubbed his temple, feeling a headache steadily growing. He, the Knights, Merlin and Gaius were standing in front an enormous creature that Arthur had definitely never seen before. It had huge, strange feet, a large nose, but comically small eyes and ears. Its teeth on the other hand, were gigantic. But for now it was just standing in the middle of the road, staring at the people in front of it. Gwen was right next to the creature, stroking its nose. She found it cute.

"What did you say it was called again?" Arthur asked Gaius.

"A hippopotamus Sire."

"And what should we do with this hippa…hipplapo…hippo?"

"I'm not sure what you can do with such a creature," Gaius admitted. "All we can do is take it back where is came from, it poses no threat to Camelot."

"But it would be a great service to Camelot! Imagine riding into battle on a hippo? All enemies would fear you!" Gwaine said excitedly.

"Don't even think about it Gwa…Gwaine, get off that hippo right now!"

Before Arthur had time to finish his moan, Gwaine had run up and climbed onto the hippo.

"Ride forward noble steed!" He cried, "To battle, for Camelot!"

Nothing happened.

The hippo just stood there looking bored.

Gwaine glared at it, "come on, move!" He gave it a firm kick in the sides, which upset the hippo quite a lot…

And that was how everyone ended up spending the whole evening trying to save a screaming Gwaine from on top of a hippo.


	41. Out of Ten

_POPPY GIRL IS NOW ON SALE ON THE KINDLE! :D Check out my profiles for more details if you're interested in buying! IT'S SO EXCITING! XD_

_*Calming down* anyway…the word for this drabble is 'callipygian' (meaning to have beautifully shaped buttocks) by Forever Day, so thank you! :D_

_Hope you all enjoy! Don't forget to review! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Out of Ten<span>

Some of you may wonder, when they're not fighting battles, sacrificing themselves and eating apples, what do the Knights of Camelot do for fun?

Well, their latest source of entertainment emerged when a drunken Gwaine was observing a barmaid, who was bending down to pick up his fallen goblet.

"Six!" He suddenly shouted.

The other, slightly less drunk, Knights turned and stared at him.

Gwaine looked back, innocently. "What? A six out of ten is a very good score for having beautifully shaped buttocks!"

"Ooh," the Knights mumbled, as if this made complete sense.

After that the activity quickly caught on, with them comparing scores of any woman they met in Camelot, and sniggering at their results.

This would just be seen as harmless fun, but alas, the Knights of Camelot can take things too far…

"Seven!"

"What?" Arthur looked around at the chuckling Knights. He had turned away for two seconds and all of a sudden they seemed to have descended into madness.

"Oh come Gwaine!" Said Lancelot, "That's a little harsh, the man's at least a seven and a half."

"Or an eight." Sir Leon joined in.

Arthur stared as the Knights nodded in agreement and began muttering amongst themselves. "Is there anything distracting you today, men?" He asked.

"Not at all!" Lancelot grinned.

The Knights sniggered again, Arthur just looked bewildered.

In the end, he just sighed and shook his head. He really wasn't in the mood for this. "You know what? I think we need a break."

"What was that about?" Merlin asked as the Knights left the training ground, he had seen the whole thing, and was also chuckling to himself, but he didn't know why.

Percival put a hand on the manservant's shoulder. "Don't you worry Merlin, you're a nine!"

"Err…thanks?" Merlin called as the Knights walked off, laughing. Leaving him to wonder if it was something he had said.


	42. Sense of Direction

_The word for this drabble is 'conquistadors' (Spanish explorers and soldiers from the 15th and 16th centuries) by Jedichild, so thank you!_

_Not too keen on the ending of this drabble, but I hope you like it anyway! Reviews awesome as always! :D_

Sense of Direction

There's always something strange about a person standing in the middle of a street, starring down at a map, wearing armour for no apparent reason and a strange shaped helmet with a bright feather sticking out of it. Merlin took a deep breath and went up to encounter this mysterious Knight. Better him than any of Camelot's Knights or that would cause some problems.

"Can I help you Sir?"

The Knight looked down his nose at Merlin; "You don't look like an Aztec." He commented.

Merlin looked down at himself, wondering what an Aztec was meant to look like. "An Az-who?"

The strange-looking Knight sighed and threw his map down on the ground angrily. "Damn it! I knew I was lost!" He turned back to Merlin, "Is there any chance you know where South America is?"

"Err…near East America…" Merlin tried.

The Knight did not look impressed.

"Sorry, who are you?" Merlin asked.

At this question, the Knight stood up straight and looked very proud, "I…am a conquistador!"

Merlin rolled his eyes. "Oh great, another one. Yeah you guys keep on making the wrong turning, you need to carry on going West, and aim towards the sea, not the land! You've still got a long way to go yet!"

The disgruntled conquistador frowned, "oh, well…thank you." And he turned and walked off, trying to remember where he had put his ship.

Merlin smiled to himself and continued to stroll down the street. Who said he wasn't good at lying?


	43. Beware of the Smirk

_The word for this drabble is sauté (definition to be found within drabble!) by Astiza, so thank you!_

_Astiza is also the one who made the fantastic front cover of Poppy Girl, check it out if you haven't already! And don't forget, it's on sale! :D_

_Hope you enjoy the drabble! Sorry about the delayed update, I've been ill, reviews make me feel better though ;)_

* * *

><p><span>Beware of the Smirk<span>

"Merlin, I'm not sure about this…"

"Sure you're sure! Just give it a try!"

Arthur looked down at the food Merlin had just placed in front of him, his nose wrinkled. Merlin stood before him, smiling encouragingly.

"I made it myself!" He added.

"That's what concerns me," Arthur muttered, picking up a fork and poking at the meat, carrots and historically-incorrect potatoes.

"I tried a new cooking technique," Merlin added, "called sauté, where you cook the food quickly in a little fat."

"Nothing good happens when something new comes along in Camelot," Arthur mumbled, but decided to try some sautéed carrots anyway, carrots are safe…right?

Merlin waited patiently as the Prince chewed, swallowed, and pulled a face. "Umm, Merlin, what fat did you fry this in?"

At this, Merlin's face fell, "Umm, you know the time when there was a drought in Camelot so I cooked you a rat?"

"Yes…" Arthur did not like where this was going.

"Well, I hoped if I used it as fat, you wouldn't notice this time—"

"_Merlin!"_

Merlin bolted out the room as Arthur came charging after him, clutching a plate full of food that would soon collide with the manservant's head.

But as they dashed out into the corridor, Gwaine appeared out of nowhere, and Arthur almost ran into him.

"Woah, slow down there Princess!" Gwaine laughed, as Arthur watched Merlin disappear over the Knight's shoulder. He glowered, but then a thought occurred to him, and he smiled.

"Fancy some sauté Gwaine?" Arthur asked, handing him the plate.

Gwaine had no idea what sauté was, but he was being offered free food, so he grinned, "thanks Arthur!" He said, taking the plate and strolling down the corridor, missing Arthur's cruel smirk that looked like it had come straight from Morgana.


	44. New Hobbies

_I finished my Psychology essay in time for a quick update! Yay! :D_

_Anyway, the word for this drabble is 'paranoid' by filly10, so thank you!_

_Hope you all enjoy! Please review! :)_

* * *

><p><span>New Hobbies<span>

Arthur was woken from his peaceful sleep by a strange, muffled sound under his bed. There was then a thump, and something went "ow!"

"Evening Merlin," Arthur groaned, dragging his eyes open and leaning over his bed.

"Evening," came a cheery yet worried voice, and Merlin's head appeared from under the bed.

"So tell me," Arthur said, rubbing his eyes sleepily. "Who's the troll this time?"

"What?"

The Prince yawned, "that's the reason you were hiding under my bed last time wasn't it? Or is there something else that you feel may hurt me unless you hide in my chamber? Is there someone planning to turn me into a donkey? Is Morgana stalking the corridors at night, trying to kill me?"

"Well, actually…"

"You know what Merlin?" Arthur said before the young Warlock could explain himself or the Morgana irony, "I think you've got a little paranoid."

Merlin was taken-aback by this statement. "No!" He said quickly, "I'm under here for a dare," he admitted sheepishly.

Arthur rolled his eyes. "Oh, really?"

"Yes, and I'm not the only one! Elyan's hiding under your desk, Leon's behind the curtain and Percival's in the cupboard!"

Arthur shook his head, Merlin really couldn't lie. Although he was sure he'd just heard the cupboard go "Ssh!"

"To be honest Merlin, feeling that you can't leave me alone at night is slightly creepy, perhaps you should talk to Gaius, get some help." Arthur suggested, rolling over. "Now get out before I have a reason to make you paranoid!"

Merlin hurried out the room, but strangely, so did figures that emerged from behind the curtain, the cupboard and under the desk.

The people of Camelot really need some new hobbies!


	45. Accio Thingymabob

_The word for this drabble is 'thingymabob' by robson3010, so thank you!_

_Over 25 copies of Poppy Girl sold now! Woo! :D_

_Hope you enjoy the drabble! Reviews much appreciated :)_

* * *

><p><span>Accio Thingymabob<span>

There's never anything good about hearing loud, clattering noises emitting from the armoury. The sounds soon brought the Knights to the door, wondering if it was safe to go in a room full of weapons that sounded like it was falling apart.

There were a few whispers and nominations of who should open the door and face possible chaos, when Sir Leon (who had never been good at arguing so couldn't bail himself out of it) slowly pushed open the door.

Arthur stood in the middle of the armoury, pulling shields off the walls, dumping swords on the floor and taking cupboards apart.

"Err…Sire," Sir Leon began.

Arthur turned around and saw the Knights, "Ah good, some helpers! I need you to find something for me."

"Find you what?" Sir Elyan asked.

Arthur hesitated, "It's umm…called umm…" he waved his hands in the air irritably, "oh, what's the name! I'll know it when I see it! It's err…thingyamabob."

"A what?"

"Thingymabob," Gwaine repeated unhelpfully.

Arthur nodded, "Yes! I know it's in here somewhere, I'm sure of it."

"Well we can't really help you if you don't what you're looking for," Sir Leon pointed out.

"Have you tried accio thingymabob?" Percival suggested.

The Knights gave him a strange look, while Arthur continued frantically searching.

Suddenly, there was a cry. "Oh, I found it!"

Arthur pulled a sword out of the clutter; it had a gold handle and strange lettering down the blade, which shone despite the dim light.

There was an uncomfortable silence.

"Err, Arthur," Lancelot said slowly, "that's excalibur."

"Yes! I knew it began with an 'e'!"

Another, more awkward pause.

"So, for a few moments, you lost the most important sword in history, and replaced its name with thingymabob?" Said Sir Leon.

"Appears so," Arthur said, looking more embarrassed now.

The knights backed out of the armoury again, wondering if they should be worried that Arthur forgot the name of his own sword, but more importantly, who was going to clean up the mess in the armoury.


	46. Still Not Listening!

_The word for this drabble is Hippopoto-monstroses-quipped-aliophobia (meaning a fear of long words) by Durandal II, so thank you!_

_This is actually the second time I've been given this word to do a drabble for! Only last time I went for an easier option! But there's no getting out of it this time! Haha_

_I must admit I did struggle with this word, but I hope you enjoy it anyway! :)_

_Please review! :)_

* * *

><p><span>Still Not Listening!<span>

"Come along Gwaine!"

"Sorry Gaius, but you can't teach me anything."

Gaius raised his eyebrow. "Oh really? Why's that?"

There was a pause, in which the Knight desperately thought of something that would get him out of Gaius' 'lesson' and to the tavern. "I have a fear of long words!"

The eyebrow rose a little more, "Really? You have hippopotomons—"

As soon as the fifth syllable left his lips, Gwaine stuck his fingers in his ears and started shouting "La, la, la, la!"

The physician was not impressed. "Gwaine, don't be childish! You're only doing this so you can avoid learning about antiestablishment—"

"La, la, la, I'm not listening, la, la la—"

"Oh don't be so idi—"

"Still not listening!" Gwaine sang loudly.

The eyebrow had almost reached the ceiling. "Idiotic isn't even a long word!" Gaius had to shout over Gwaine's very poor singing.

"It's is now!" Gwaine said, "honestly Gaius, this is bordering on cruelty!"

Though Gaius felt like he was the one suffering, "Honestly Gwaine, I don't understand why you refuse to co-opera—"

"LA, LA, LA…"

Arthur froze outside Gaius' chambers; he could hear strange noises within. It sounded like someone was trying very badly to sing, while someone else was getting all the more irritated until, cursing, they threw open the chamber door.

Gaius glowered at Arthur, while in the background Gwaine continued singing. "I've tried my best Arthur, but I'm afraid you're just going to be stuck with Knights with a minus IQ!"

And with that, he stormed off, leaving Arthur confused and Gwaine victorious.


	47. The Feminine Voice

_The word for this drabble is 'schizophrenic' by Jedichild, I have to admit I had a lot of trouble with this word, but not in the usual sense – schizophrenia is a serious mental disorder, and I found it very difficult trying to write a humorous drabble without being offensive._

_So, I have tried my best to use this word without being hurtful, I've gone for the whole 'hearing voices in the head' sort of thing, and I hope it's ok! Please tell me if you find it offensive and I will change it :)_

_On a happier note – we've almost reached 200 reviews everyone! :D That's fantastic, I've never had 200 reviews for a story before, come on everyone, we can do it! :D_

* * *

><p><span>The Feminine Voice<span>

Morgana stood silently in her chamber, watching the flames crackle in the fireplace. She muttered another spell and threw some purple powder into the fire, which hissed and turned pink for a few seconds before becoming bright orange once again. She smirked (smiling is not enough for the evil), her spell was almost complete, then she would be able to smite Camelot and—

There was a knock on the door, "Morgana?" Said a voice.

Before Morgana could respond, the door was slowly pushed open. Cursing, she ran from the fire and hid behind her bed.

Arthur stepped into the chamber (trust him to not wait for a response) and looked around the seemingly empty chamber. "Morgana?" He repeated.

"Morgana's not here," hissed a voice. "Go…go check the stables!" It ordered.

Arthur froze, and stared around the room. "Who said that?"

"Err," Clearly Morgana had not thought this through. "The voice inside your head!" She whispered hurriedly.

"Really?" Arthur frowned, "I didn't expect the voice in my head to be so…feminine."

"Oh," the voice sounded slightly annoyed by this. "Well it's definitely not Morgana, and she's not in here either! Just go check the stables!"

The Prince glanced round the room again, as if expecting the owner of the voice to suddenly jump out, before shrugging and leaving the chamber, and presumably heading for the stables.

Morgana sighed in annoyance, before jumping up and hurrying to the fire. But it was already dying down, her spell was ruined.

She cast a glare at where Arthur had stood, how could someone be so stupid and yet foil her plans so quickly?

It certainly said something about her planning…


	48. A Good Use for Ice Cream

_The word for this drabble is 'ice cream' by Emrys Pendragon, so thank you!_

_Woo, we've reached 200 reviews everyone! :D Big thanks for all the reviews so far, please keep them up!_

_Not too keen on my drabble for this one, but I hope you enjoy :)_

* * *

><p><span>A Good Use for Ice Cream<span>

"How come Gwaine gets two scoops? That's not fair!"

"That's because I'm Merlin's favourite, isn't that right Merlin?"

"Err… I'm not going to take sides here…"

Merlin was gratefully distracted by what looked like a fight that was about to break out between Sir Leon and Gwaine over ice cream, by Gwen, who smiled up at him; "This was a great idea Merlin, it's certainly made this day more bearable. You wouldn't mind if I had some more would you?"

It certainly was a difficult day to get through, it was the hottest summer Camelot had faced in a long time, and a stark contrast to the weather the author of these drabbles was currently experiencing. Fortunately, Merlin had just invented ice cream (which had nothing to do with magic at all, he swears with shifty eyes) and at the very same time ice cream cones, and now everyone was gathering to have some. He smiled in response to Gwen's compliment, and gave her another ice cream.

The Knights stared, "So that's how you do it," murmured Gwaine, "you actually have to be _nice _to him…"

Gwen wandered back to where Arthur was sitting, waiting for her. He gave a small frown as she sat next to him.

"What's the matter?" She asked.

"Isn't that your…third ice cream?" Arthur commented.

"Yes, so?"

Arthur should have really thought about what he should say next, but, being Arthur, he didn't. "I think you should slow down on the ice cream intake."

Immediately, Gwen's smiling face turned into a threatening glare, "why?" She demanded.

Unfortunately, Arthur didn't see the danger, "I'm just thinking that you should keep an eye on your figure—"

Before he could even finish his un-intended insult, Arthur found an ice cream being shoved up his nose.

Gwen stormed off in a huff, leaving a confused Prince with a very cold nose. Arthur looked up to see Merlin and the Knights staring at him.

There was an awkward silence.

"Now _that_ is a good use for ice cream," Gwaine announced.


	49. Cake Making

_The word for this drabble is lugubrious (meaning gloomy, sad) by thehiddenmadness, so thank you!_

_Hope you enjoy the drabble, reviews much appreciated :)_

* * *

><p><span>Cake Making<span>

After not seeing his friend for several days, Lancelot decided to pay Merlin a visit. He eventually found the young Warlock in his chamber, curled up on his bed with his face against the wall.

"Merlin? What's wrong?" Lancelot asked tentatively.

"Nothing," Merlin sighed heavily. "I'm just feeling a little lonely because there's no one to love me, and I'm sick of keeping so many secrets, but if I told Arthur about my magic he'd have me killed, so I just have to continue to work my fingers to the bone and keep on saving the day without even getting a thank you."

There was a pause, "Something tells me you're not happy at the moment," Lancelot commented.

"What gave it away?"

Lancelot shook his head, "Don't worry Merlin, I'll find something to cheer you up!"

Three hours later, Merlin heard his door open and smelt something that was badly burnt. He turned around.

All the Knights were standing at his door, grinning. Lancelot held out something browny-black with sprinkles on the top.

"What the…"

"I told everyone you were feeling lugubrious Merlin," Lancelot explained. "So we made something to cheer you up!"

Merlin sat up; "It looks like something that's been on fire…"

"Err yes, it was a little bit, and so was Gwaine's hair, but we hadn't made a cake before."

For the first time in days, Merlin smiled. "You made me a cake?"

"Yes, we all helped!" Elyan put in, "Even Arthur…well, he put the sprinkles on top."

"Would you like to try some?" Gwaine asked.

"Errr…actually, I might pass," Merlin confessed, looking at the burnt cake, yet he grinned. "But thanks so much everyone, that's really cheered me up!"

The Knights smiled happily, while Gwaine wondered if anyone would mind if he ate the cake…


	50. Merlin the Alsation

_The word for this drabble is 'phantasmagoria' (meaning strange images like that seen in a dream), by Chaimera, so thank you!_

_We've officially reached 50 drabbles everyone! :D You may remember ages ago I said I would stop at 50 drabbles, but I still have random words to write, so I shall continue until I have completed all of them, and instead I'm going to ask for no more random words to be given to me, or else it might go on forever!_

_But, if you want to give one last random word or had a good one you wanted to give me, I will accept them for this chapter's reviews :) so, this is your LAST CHANCE to give me a random word! _

_I hope that made sense! This drabble's not my best but I hope you enjoy it :)_

* * *

><p><span>Merlin the Alsatian<span>

Arthur strolled into his chamber, and froze. Merlin, who was lingering behind him, was concerned.

"What's the matter?" He asked.

"My chamber…" Arthur hesitated, "It's…clean."

Merlin grinned, "Yes."

Arthur went over to where he had left his armour, and found it so well polished he could see his face reflected in it. The Prince couldn't help but feel impressed, and he told Merlin so.

His manservant grinned even more. "I know! And if you check, there won't be any rats eating your shoes, and even the horses are surprised by how tidy the stables are!"

"Wow…Merlin, how did you do all of this?"

Merlin shrugged, "mainly by using magic."

Arthur nodded, as if such a thing to say was completely normal.

Then his face fell, "hang on."

"What?" Asked Merlin.

"This is clearly a dream."

"Why do you say that?"

"Well, only in an imaginary world would you tidy my chamber so well, and I know that the stables are muched out without even looking at them, but in real life I would never believe you. There's also no chance that you have magic, what idiot does my subconscious take me for?" Arthur turned round to Merlin as he spoke, "and another thing, you've just turned into an Alsatian*."

"Ruff," barked the Merlin dog.

"Yes I suppose it must be." Said Arthur casually, "now if you don't mind, I'm going to go to bed so I can I wake up to a slightly more normal life." He pointed at the door, "out."

The Merlin dog trotted out, tail between his legs. Arthur smiled, if only human servants were that easy to handle.

* * *

><p><em>*A little Blackadder dream-sequence joke there, "Bouldrick, who gave you permission to turn into an Alsation?"<em>


	51. Girl Fight

_The word for this drabble is 'kerfuffle' by austen2gaskell, so thanks!_

_Remember, no more random words from now on please! But of course you're still very welcome to review! :D_

_Enjoy the drabble! :)_

* * *

><p><span>Girl Fight<span>

I suppose it wouldn't be a surprise if I told you the Knights were always causing a commotion, a kerfuffle. They just seem like the…kerfuffling type. But it's the silent ones, like Percival, that are usually the cause of the fuss, and it's always the quiet ones you've got to look out for. And this kerfuff-ling story, is no different.

Elyan saw the broad grin on Gwaine's face when he was handed a letter, and quickly became interested. "Who's that from?" He asked.

Gwaine smiled, almost shyly, "a friend." He replied.

This immediately caused even more interested from Elyan, while Pericval just listened quietly. "What's her name?" He asked.

"Jillian," Gwaine admitted bashfully.

Strangely, Elyan's face then fell. "She can't be."

"Why not?"

"Because that's the name of the girl I've been writing to," Elyan explained.

Gwaine was confused, "perhaps there's more than one…"

"No, that's her handwriting," Elyan said, leaning over and looking at the letter.

There was an awkward silence, in which Elyan and Gwaine stared, slightly horrified, at each other.

Then Gwaine shrugged, "Never mind, it's me she truly loves anyway."

Something told Gwaine this was not a good thing to say, mainly by the way Elyan threw himself at him and he ended up rolling on the floor. He scrambled up, accidentally (he claimed) kicking Elyan in the nose, who retaliated by pulling Gwaine's hair.

Soon a huge fight broke out between the two, and when Arthur finally pulled them apart and tried to find a reason for the kerfuffle, no one suspected the silent Percival still sitting in the corner, who's middle name happened to be Jillian, and who enjoyed causing a bit of trouble…


	52. The Season to be Jolly

_The word for this drabble is 'Christmas' by AlwaysWatching96, so thank you!_

_I posted this word early to make sure I used it before Christmas! My apologies for all those who are reading this and it's not Christmas!_

_And to anyone who's interested – I just updated a short Merlin one-shot about Morgana, I won't say any more as there are spoilers for 4x12 but feel free to check it out! :D_

_Please review, and since we're on the subject, have a merry Christmas everyone! :D_

* * *

><p><span>The Season to be Jolly<span>

Uther opened the door to the Great Hall, to have a burst of slightly out-of-tune, but very loud, music hit him like a brick wall.

"T'is the season to be jolly, fa la la la, fa la la—"

"Aaagh!" The King cried, slamming the door shut. After a few moments he took a deep breath and persuaded himself to open the door again.

Everyone from Camelot, from Knights to servants, were all in the Great Hall singing Deck the Halls, with Gaius conducting. They were still singing merrily and didn't notice an angry Uther, until he made himself known.

"What is the meaning of this!" He bellowed.

The singers fell silent quickly.

Gwen was brave enough to speak first. "It's just Christmas carols Sire."

"Carols? Well I don't like them! And would someone please explain to me why there is a tree indoors, what's with all the mistletoe, and why my son is wearing that ridiculous hat?"

"Because it's Christmas father," Arthur said gingerly, taking off his santa hat. "Everyone does this sort of thing at Christmas."

"Pah, not in my Kingdom! Humbug!" Uther snapped.

But the Christmas spirit is surprisingly catching, and not even someone like Uther can escape its jolly, feel-good grasp. Soon, guess who was volunteering to do a solo for Hark the Herald?


	53. Faking It

_The word for this drabble is 'amputation' by Astiza, so thank you!_

_This is my first drabble I have uploaded onto fanfiction with my __new__ lap top! :D Yay! I'm very excited about that :D_

_Anyway, hope you enjoy the drabble! I'm not too keen on the name or the ending, so if you have any ideas to improve it please say :)_

_Reviews much appreciated :) and don't forget about my little Morgana one-shot I put up the other day, only 2 reviews for it so far! :O_

* * *

><p><span>Faking It<span>

They carried the groaning Gwaine into Gaius' chamber, the young Knight screwed up his eyes in pain and clutched his leg.

"What happened?" Gaius asked.

"We were inventing football," Arthur explained as Gwaine was laid down on the Physician's work bench, "When Gwaine fell over and claimed Lancelot had tripped him."

Gwaine stopped groaning for a few moments to snap "he did!" Lancelot, being too nice for his own good, just looked guilty and mumbled a fourteenth apology, but Gwaine had gone back to moaning in agony. "Oh the pain, the_ pain_! I think it's broken Gaius!"

The physician checked the Knight's leg with a raised eyebrow. He looked up at Arthur who also raised an eyebrow in a 'I know what you're thinking, I'm thinking it too,' way. Who knew eyebrows could communicate so well?

Gaius turned back to Gwaine, who was rolling around in pain whilst trying not to fall off the bench. "Well there's only one thing we can do," he sighed, "We'll have to amputate."

Gwaine froze and his head snapped up, "Ampu-what?"

"Amputate, remove your leg, chop it off." Gaius said matter-of-factly, "It's the only option left. Don't worry Gwaine, some people do survive amputation, although I am a bit out of practice. Arthur, could you fetch me my saw..."

"Saw!" Suddenly, Gwaine leapt up. "Oh, look at that, I can stand on my leg!" He cried, "In fact, I think I might be able to walk! Thank you Gaius, but an amputation will not be necessary," and with that, he fled from the chamber.

Gaius and Arthur chuckled to themselves, they could tell when someone was faking it.


	54. The Knights of Bree

_The word for this drabble is 'if' by Robson 3010, so thank you!_

_This drabble is based on the Knights of Nee from Monty Python, if you don't know them, this will seem more random than usual...but just go with the flow :)_

_I won't be able to update for a few days, can't think why...oh yeah, Christmas! :D So have a merry Christmas everyone! :)_

_Reviews are awesome! :D_

* * *

><p><span>The Knights of Bree<span>

Arthur frowned and scratched his head again, thinking as hard as he could, which was getting difficult.

He and Merlin were out hunting when they had stumbled upon group of Knights, all dressed in black and about six foot tall. They called themselves the Knights of Bree (Arthur was sure that was some sort of cheese) and weren't allowing him or Merlin to pass, worst of all, they were threatening to take over Camelot! Arthur was desperately trying to think about what to do.

Suddenly, Merlin had an idea, "What if-"

But Merlin could hardly say any more as the Knights of Bree, standing before him, suddenly shrieked.

"Aagh!" Cried what looked like their leader, "Don't say that!"

Merlin was confused, "Say what?"

The leader rolled his eyes, "Well _I _can't say can I? It's a very bad word!"

"Hmm," Arthur turned to Merlin, "If we find this word, we could use it against them..."

"Aagh! You said it again!" Snapped the leader.

"When?" Arthur demanded.

Merlin shook his head, "Look Arthur, what if-"

"Aagh!"

"Ssh!" Merlin snapped, "If I could just hear myself think-"

"Aagh! Then stop saying the word!"

Both Arthur and Merlin were getting very irritated now, "But what is the word?" They asked.

The leader sighed, some people don't get it. "Look, I can't say the word, because if I did...oh God, I said it! Aagh! What happens if I say it...Aagh! I said it again!"

All the Knights were now squealing now, while Arthur and Merlin stared in horror and confusion.

"Err, maybe it would be best if we go..." Merlin suggested.

"Aagh! Yes please do! If I hear it again...Oh no, I said it _again_!"

In the end Merlin and Arthur walked off, muttering to each other and rolling their eyes, leaving the Knights of Bree to scream to themselves and the leader squealing about a certain 'evil' two lettered word.


	55. Birthday Party

_The word for this drabble is 'panache' (a plume of feathers on a headdress) by Astiza, so thank you!_

_I hope everyone had a great Christmas etc :) Alas, Merlin series 4 is now over, I shall miss it, but I thoroughly enjoyed it and Sherlock series 2 is returning very soon, that should help me recover! :D_

_Anyway, enjoy! And please review! :)_

* * *

><p><span>Birthday Party<span>

Another goblet thumped against the wardrobe door just as Gwaine slammed it shut. He glanced into the darkness at Arthur and Merlin, one looking the worried, the other annoyed, you can guess which expression matched which person.

"I think we may have encountered a situation," Gwaine whispered, the shouting could still be heard from outside.

Arthur's raised eyebrow could just be seen through the darkness, "really? I would never have guessed! This is the last time I let you give Merlin a birthday party!"

"It's the thought that counts!" Gwaine snapped.

"I was enjoying myself," Merlin admitted, "until now."

Gwaine peered through a crack in a door. "They do look angry. Unless either of you have a plan...it's not going to be pretty."

Merlin went pale and Arthur rolled his eyes, Gwaine was overreacting, but the crowd outside did sound angry, and the wardrobe wouldn't protect them for long. Maybe there was something that could distract the angry mob?

As Arthur thought this, he felt his foot knock against something on the ground. He peered through the darkness, and then smiled.

"Oh Gwaine," he called, "I think I've found a solution."

The mob finally stopped their jeering and shouting for blood when they saw the wardrobe finally creak open, and someone step out.

Gwaine appeared, wearing nothing but his underwear (that looked a little grey) and a plume of bright pink and blue feathers on top of a helmet on his head. He grinned (and looked like he was actually enjoying himself.)

"Boys," he announced, "Feast your eyes, on the panache!"

There was a pause, as no one actually knew what a panache was, but with the sight of this half-naked, grinning Knight, they all took it the wrong way.

Within two minutes the whole mob had fled screaming from the tavern, with Gwaine asking them to shut the door behind them, as it was getting chilly!


	56. Take That Magic

_The word for this drabble is 'boyband' by StarryNigh359, so thank you!_

_Hope you enjoy the drabble! Reviews much appreciated :)_

* * *

><p><span>Take That Magic<span>

"Next!"

The disappointed peasant trundled out of the Great Hall, while Arthur wondered if his ears could stand much more tuneless singing. He should have never created his own Camelot Talent Competition to find some decent entertainment for the feast tomorrow, but these people were as useless as the guards!

After a few moments the next group of hopeful 'talents' came in, and Arthur's eyes widened in surprise. Gwaine, Elayn, Percival, Lancelot and Leon stood in before him, looking a little nervous.

"Aren't you meant to be defending the Eastern boarder?" Arthur pointed out.

Sir Leon shrugged, "We were, but then we heard about your talent show and-"

"We're a boy band now!" Squealed the over-enthusiastic Gwaine. "Called Take That Magic!"

"A...boy band?" Arthur repeated. "Take That...oh boy." He took a deep breath, could this day get any worse? "All right then, show me what you can do."

The next evening, Arthur found himself in the Great Hall once more, watching his Knights who were dressed up in something that... did it just sparkle? They were singing songs from a genre that wouldn't be invented for another few hundred years, singing a song called 'Shine-eth' and something about stars. Arthur felt so embarrassed, but this was the only talent he could find. However, as he gazed around the Hall, he saw people were listening to the music and smiling, Gwen and Merlin were trying to dance, and even he could feel his toe tapping along to the rhythm.

Perhaps this wasn't such a bad idea after all. He wondered what the Knights would say to a contract...


	57. Escape Plan

_The word for this drabble is 'acquaintance' by Jedichild, so thank you!_

_I've had a couple of requests for random words recently, so I just want to remind people that I'm no longer taking in any more random words, sorry! Of course reviews are still much appreciated :)_

_Exciting news - Poppy Girl has reached 50 copies sold! :D_

_Have a happy new year everyone! :D_

* * *

><p><span>Escape Plan<span>

"This is fantastic!" Exclaimed the evil King, rubbing his hands together. "I can't wait to tell Morgana!"

Arthur was surprised, "You know Morgana?"

"They always do," muttered Merlin.

Arthur and Merlin were standing in an old, cold, dark, damp castle. They'd been brought there after they had been kidnapped by a group of bandits.

The grinning King began pacing up and down. "I couldn't believe it when I heard someone was caught hunting in _my_ forest, and it was Arthur Pendragon!" He gestured to Merlin, "And this...scrawny one."

Merlin looked down at himself as if expecting to see a 'Scrawny' name tag.

"So," the King of whoever-he-was stopped pacing to look at the two carefully. "How do you two know each other?"

Immediately, Arthur and Merlin began blabbering excuses.

"Hardly know him!"

"We're mere acquaintances."

"I don't make friends with clotpoles."

"I don't make friends with useless servants."

Merlin glared at Arthur, "Sorry, useless?"

"Yes aquaintance-who-I-hardly-know-if-you-want-to-get-out-of-here-alive. Useless." Arthur muttered.

"Honestly, you don't know how much I do for you!" Merlin snapped, "I cook your food, I wash your clothes-"

"Really? I hope not, because you're doing a terrible job of it!"

The King rolled his eyes, it seemed this Prince and manservant were having, what his mother called, a 'domestic'.

"I always have to tidy up the mess you leave behind and do I get a thank you? No!"

"Perhaps if you actually deserved my thanks, I would give it to you!"

Realising the two had forgotten about his existence, the King coughed loudly and raised an eyebrow. "Acquaintances, really?"

"Yes, hardly see him."

"That's no surprise_ Merlin_ when you keep on running off all the time!"

"Oh_ I_ run off-"

The King sighed, these two were more like a married couple than acquaintances! And they were giving him a headache. He left the room to let the two finish their squabbling, he needed some peace and quiet.

Merlin and Arthur continued arguing until they were sure the King had gone, then grinned at each other.

"Told you that would work," said Merlin.


	58. Cheating

_The word for this drabble is 'Expelliarmus' by whitecrossgirl, so thanks!_

_For anyone who's interested, I've recently put up a one shot for the new and awesome Sherlock Holmes film A Game of Shadows, feel free to have a read and review :)_

_Would just like to pay my respects to my GCSE maths teacher, who I have discovered today has died, RIP Mrs White, so sad._

_Reviews much loved :)_

* * *

><p><span>Cheating<span>

"Merlin, do something!" Arthur yelled as another one of Udin's men charged towards him.

"Do what?" Merlin asked, trying hard not to panic, but it was just the two of them, and there seemed to be a countless number of Udin's men, when were their Knights going to get here and help?

Arthur had a brief sword fight with the soldier before kicking him down and shouting, "What else? Magic you idiot!"

But Merlin's mind had gone blank, he just stood there, mouth gaping like a goldfish.

"Look Merlin," Arthur spat, "just because your magic's legal now doesn't mean I won't have you executed for imitating animals! Now for goodness sake, do _something_!"

Another solider came charging towards them, a spiked club in hand. Merlin yelled the first spell that came into his head.

"Expelliarmus!"

The soldier's club was torn out of his hand by some invisible force. The man watched it hover in the air before falling down on his head with a nasty _crack_. He fell to the ground.

There was a pause as turned Arthur and stared at Merlin. "That's not one of yours." He said.

"What?"

"That's cheating if you use someone else's spell! I just hope it's not copy-righted, or else some guy in robes is going to time travel here and sue Camelot!"

Merlin rolled his eyes, "There's no pleasing you sometimes, you know."

"Well, you don't see a baddy appear with no nose do you? And you don't have a scar depicting the weather do you? No! So why should we copy their spells?"

"Can I just point out I saved your life?"

"You always save my life Merlin, some things just get old."

The Knights heard Merlin and Arthur arguing before they saw them. It ended with someone shouting "Petrificus Totalus" and a few moments later they saw Merlin storming off in the distance, muttering something about Arthur being a floorboard.


	59. Smudge

_The word for this drabble is 'Nightmare' by LunaShadowWolf13, so thank you!_

_This is our last random word everyone! D: But don't worry, there's still one more drabble to go..._

_Please review! :)_

* * *

><p><span>Smudge<span>

Merlin didn't think there was anything different about his day as he strolled to Arthur's chamber, the only thing unusual was that there was a white cat with a black smudge over its eye, sitting outside Arthur's room. When he entered Arthur's chamber the Prince turned and quickly shouted,

"Shut the door, shut the door!" He ran past Merlin and slammed the door shut.

His manservant stared at him, "What's happened?"

Arthur leaned against the door, breathing heavily, "I had a nightmare."

"So you need to shut yourself away just in case you turn into Morgana?"

"No! I had a nightmare about," Arthur paused, "that cat."

"What cat?"

Arthur gave an exasperated sigh. "The one outside my door! It came into my room and ate all my socks! Including the ones on my feet! And I wake up to find it's out there, waiting for me..."

Merlin stared at him, and then burst out laughing. Arthur glared.

"It's not funny, _Mer_lin! I don't laugh at people when they have nightmares!"

"That's because they don't usually involve kittens-"

"Shut up Merlin!" Arthur snapped, "just go and do something useful like clean out the stables."

But Merlin had a devilish grin on his face. "Of course, and on the way I might bump into your fellow Knights, who would love to hear how a bad dream has made you afraid of a little kitty cat."

The colour drained from Arthur's face. "You wouldn't-"

"Meow," mocked Merlin.

"Fine, you don't have to clean the stables-"

"Meow..."

"All right! Take the whole day off!" Arthur almost yelled. "Now get out and don't say a word about the...beast."

Merlin grinned, "of course not, Sire," he said, and then left. The cat was still sitting outside the door. He smiled at it, "Good boy, Smudge." He cooed.


	60. Thank You

_It's our final drabble everyone! I can't quite believe it's over! D: I shall miss it, this is the longest fic I've ever written (chapter-wise) and it's probably taken me the longest to do! It's been so much fun doing all your random words! So it's time for the last drabble..._

_And the word is 'thank you'... yes that's more than one word, and yes it does sound cheesy, but I decided to use it just to say thanks for all the alerts, favourites, and of course, reviews :) and I didn't know how else to end these drabbles, so thank you it is! :D_

_And if anyone's interested, I have written other stories, Merlin and non-Merlin, feel free to have a read! :D A__nd don't forget about Poppy Girl! I'm going to start sending it to agents again this month, so wish me luck! You can follow my progress with my book on my profile or on facebook, and if I get any big news I might post it on here :)_

_9/01/12 - just updating to say I've decided to continue my Mergana poem 'What Happened' to a series of poems based on what, how, when, why and where of their relationship. Please have a read! :) And I also discovered today that I've got an offer from my favourite Univserity! YAAY! :D_

_Anyway, here is the last drabble! I hope you enjoy! And don't forget to post that one last review..._

_Best wishes, Naisa x_

* * *

><p><span>Thank You<span>

"Merlin,"

_Oh no,_ thought Merlin, as he turned and looked at Arthur, _by that tone, it sounds like he's been thinking about something..._

"Did I ever thank you?"

Sometimes, people could be as cryptic as the Great Dragon.

"Thank me for what?" He asked.

"For all the things you ever did for me," Arthur explained, "you'd follow me to the ends of the earth, and it doesn't matter what stick I give you, you'll always be loyal to me. And even though you're the worst servant I've ever had, you do do some things right sometimes, and you've always been a good friend."

Merlin wasn't sure if some elements of that speech was a compliment or not, but he stared at Arthur, wondering if he'd got drunk last night with Gwaine and set a charm on the Prince to make him nice, and rather cheesy is some respects.

"What are you staring at?" Arthur demanded suddenly.

_Ok, so maybe not a charm to make him nice, but this really wasn't normal_. "Are you quite well Sire?" Merlin asked.

"Of course I'm all right! Can't I say thank you to someone once in a while without sounding insane?"

Definitely not a charm, "No, not really."

Arthur sighed, and held out his arms, "All right, come on then."

"What are you doing?"

The Prince rolled his eyes, "What do you think? I'm offering you a hug!"

Merlin actually stepped back a little, "Are you sure you're all right?"

"Yes, now give me a hug!" Arthur snapped.

Merlin stepped back a little further, Arthur was worrying him more every second. Had something been put in his drink?

"Oh for goodness sake Merlin, give me a hug!"

Three minutes later, the members of Camelot were disturbed from their every day work, when they heard running footsteps and saw Merlin dash down the corridor, quickly followed by Arthur, arms wide, yelling "Give me some love damn it! LOVE ME!"

There was much sighing and eye rolling from everyone, as they wondered what having a normal day in Camelot was like.


End file.
